


Do You Believe In Ghosts, Because I Believe In You

by killajokejosie



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Beautiful, Body Image, Cheating, Coats, Coffee Shops, Detectives, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Emotional Infidelity, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Gotham City Police Department, Harassment, Love at First Sight, Love/Hate, M/M, Macabre, Minor Violence, Nasty boys, Oral Sex, Oswald destroys Jim's sanity but he likes it, Oswald's umbrella is a thing, Rough Sex, Scars, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Shower Sex, Sweat, Switching Sides, Top Jim, crazy Barbara, lifting heavy objects, limps, minor homophobia, past Barbara Kean/Renee Montoya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-03-20 02:17:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 26,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3632946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killajokejosie/pseuds/killajokejosie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim can't help it. Literally. Every fiber of his being is pulled towards the one person in the city that he should not be drawn to at all. He knows it is wrong. Detectives don't have feelings for members of crime syndicates...</p><p>But if it is all so bad, then why does it feel like his life won't be complete without the Penguin in it. </p><p>Changes the timeline enough so that things can just happen.</p><p>(Summary does not even begin to explain the half of it)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Twist The Knife

**Author's Note:**

> I just don't know.

It was the biggest mistake I had made in my entire life. There literally wasn't a damn thing I could have done to make it less regrettable. His words, his voice, his eyes, all working together, all driving me to make the choice that was not only a test of who I am as a person, but also how easily he was able to get under my skin.

The whole situation was completely and fully mind blowing.

And, I was still thinking about it hours after I pushed him off the edge of the docks, into the cold water. Thinking about the exact words that he said and the shivers he sent down my spine. Thinking about the fact that somehow Harvey was going to find out about this. 

One way or another all of the madness that had been falling down around me in this city was going to do me in. HE made me feel that way. That was why I wanted a do-over. To fix this damn mistake. 

Though, in all honestly, I probably would have made the same decision. I don't care who you are or what you do for a living, you don't shoot men because the local mob tells you to, especially if you are an officer of the law. 

_He could still come back._

Why am I still thinking about this? Re-hashing it over and over again in my head?

Because I knew that mistake, or rather unfortunately good moral standing had left me with an empty space. In a sense, I suppose, I wanted him to come back. He haunted me.

***

I did whatever it took to act normal in front of everyone. I was not about to let the funny little man who worked for Fish Mooney get to me. I simply didn't have the time for it.

Despite all the effort that I put into seeming alright, it was usually at the worst times when my crumbling facade had darkness shining through its cracks. The whole concept of what I was becoming was extremely unfortunate. 

Even my soon-to-be wife couldn't bring me out of my funk. Lord knows that she tried. 

"Are you sure that nothing is bothering you?" She asked me in her most sultry, seductive tone.

"Nothing is bothering me. At all. I promise." My reply certainly was not as strong sounding as I had hoped it would be.

"I don't know if I believe you or not. You have been acting so strange lately. Half of the time it is as if you would rather be alone with your thoughts than experience genuine human contact." She could see through me, almost always.

I shook my head. "I don't know what exactly put that crazy idea in your head, but I assure you that it is not true."

"Then do you plan on telling me what you have been thinking about?" She also always knew just how to word things so that there was no possible way I could say no.

"Honestly? Well, I came across this...mid-level criminal who said something very cryptic about a turf or gang war that was coming to the city. He also added in something about being clever, but I think that is probably irrelevant. Anyways, he...his words really got to me." I finished with an overdue sigh.

Barbara raised her eyebrows at me, not saying a word, waiting to see if I was finished speaking. I nodded lightly to assure her that it was indeed time to respond.

"That is really...strange. It sounds to me like it might have just been the man trying to save his own ass."

"No, he was trying to save his own ass when he told me that he would be my slave if I didn't shoot him,"

"Did you shoot him?"

"No, but I shot in his direction,"

"Explains why someone told me that you did, in fact, kill a man, splattering his brains all over the river..." Barbara trailed off, recalling some nonsense account of what really happened, a nonsense account of what I was even capable of.

"You honestly think that I am going to kill a man just because a bad guy wants him dead?" I asked her, trying not to sound accusatory. 

"No, I don't, but sometimes...when you hear things, it puts ideas in your head even if they are crazy things."

"Yeah, I guess,"

It was really no use trying to explain myself further. He had gotten to me and now it was as good a time as any to accept my true defeat. Obviously, I have someone who is out to get me and they have been talking to Barbara, but I could deal with that at another time. Enough said.

***

He haunted me again, in my dreams. His piercing eyes were unlike anything I had ever seen before. I liked the way he looked at me, even out of fear. It was exciting, perhaps even invigorating.

In my dreams the scenario played out quite a bit differently than reality. He wanted to be my slave, but in a way more inappropriate than his real intention. The blood flow in my body redirected to an area significantly lower than my brain. I had completely lost my mind.

_How could a straight man like myself have attractions to another man?_

I sprung awake. I managed to rip myself away from the quickly escalating dream. My body was drenched in sweat and my breathing was horribly uneasy. I couldn't shake the images out of my head. 

I also couldn't figure out what it was about that man that caused me to feel aroused. His oddball gothic femininity? What was wrong with me?

"Did you have a bad dream" Barbara asked sleepily.

"Uh...well...no..." I hoped there was no way she could tell what condition my body was in at that moment.

"Mmmhmmm," She mumbled before laying down and going back to sleep.

"Freaking hell," I grumbled, knowing all to well that I was not going to get back to sleep. 


	2. A New Kind of Dispair

I tried to do everything in my power, everything to keep my head on straight. It was effective less than twelve percent of the time. The other eighty-eight percent of the time I was being taken over by an alternate, less conventional source. If this continued, I would be declared mad by the end of the week. I knew that they were preparing to do something with Arkham, perhaps it would be just in time for my unraveling. 

Harvey was no help, either. He was somehow slightly more distracting than Barbara, and he didn't ask me what was going on every five minutes, but that was not enough. Essentially, I had no escape route. I was trapped in the confines of my heavily diseased mind. 

"Look alive, Jim," Harvey said as he slapped me hard across the back. I hadn't dozed off, but I was definitely dazing.

"Was that necessary?" I asked, reaching back to rub where the sting radiated through my shoulder blades.

"We have to go and you are just sitting there like a dumbass, so yes,"

"Where are we going?" _Why couldn't I remember what was going on?_   Was I really paying that little attention that I missed whatever briefing he had given me in the moments prior?

"We have a c...nope, you know what? I am not explaining it again, just get up and let's get going."

I could respect that. I would have been ticked off if the roles were reversed. There was no time to waste. We did have an actual job to do and certainly I would find a way to pull myself together.

***

The crime scene had me at a loss of words and coherent thought. It was unique to Gotham, this type of crime. It shouldn't have been a real surprise though, I know where I live, where I work. This was just another day at the office. 

But seriously, weather balloons?

The killer was tying people to weather balloons that would eventually pop, sending whomever was attached back down to the ground, already dead. The victims were all awful excuses for human beings in their own right, but that did not make things less of a problem. 

At least with this chain of events, it would be significantly easier to track who the next victim was. Track the victim, find the killer, solve the case. It was almost simple enough to think about, making me certain that it would not go as planned. Thank goodness I am dedicated to my job.

***

When I arrived home, Barbara wasn't there. She left me a note that said she went out and would be back before dark. I hated that it was vague and more so that it was hardly going to be more than twenty minutes until the sun set. 

I shook it off. There wasn't anything I could do about it, anyways. I allowed myself to crash down onto the sofa, sinking in and becoming one with it. For a moment, I thought that I might be able to get some sleep, and of course I wanted that more than anything. My worn out eyes began to close as I drifted off to the best of my availabilty. 

Just as I thought I might be able to get some rest, there was a persistent knock. I didn't even want to think about who it might be. I might have been in a nice building, but that didn't spare me from a slew of over the top crazy neighbors.

"Just let them keep knocking, Jim, they will think you are not home and then they will leave you alone," I said to myself, outloud for some reason as if I was saying it to convince myself. Maybe I was. In all reality, I should have been, I mean, I did just recently NOT kill a guy that everyone wanted dead. Well, not exactly everyone.

I tried to ignore it a little longer. Whoever was knocking was obviously above attempting to knock down my door, so the threat was a bit diminished. 

"Jim! Open up!" My heart sank. I was weirdly disappointed to hear the voice. I just didn't know why. "I hate to break it to you, but I do know that you are in there."

I sighed. "Fine,"

I got up and walked over to let Harvey in. He looked me up and down as if he were an army doctor assessing my injuries. His hands found an interesting resting place on my shoulders at the conclusion. "We are in big trouble,"

My lips parted as I searched for a response that sounded intelligent enough to be valid. "Wi...with...what for? Why are we in trouble?"  _So much for that._

"Montoya and Allen know about you killing Cobblepot. There is going to be a case brought against you. I know that you know that means it won't just be you. Who knows what kind of evidence they have, I don't." Harvey explained with wide eyes.

In my head I was screaming. _'I didn't kill Cobblepot!'_ over and over again. I was running possible responses that would follow through my mind, none of them were even remotely good. I had betrayed his trust, even if what I was asked to do was morally wrong.

"In order to have enough evidence to arrest me, they have to have enough to take down the entire police department. It is a total farce. They are just trying to scare someone involved into giving up information. Stirring up rumors. That is all that this is." I told him.

"I could use a stiff drink," He chuckled. He was already sporting a pretty hefty buzz from whatever was in his trusty flask. All comments Harvey Bullock made about alcohol were usually understatements in some form, or another. "Let's hit the bar."

"That's great, but, uh, Barbara is going to be home any minute. I haven't seen her all day. It is just best if I stay home." I really hoped that I didn't sound as unsure of myself as I thought.

Harvey raised an eyebrow. "Okay, whatever you say, see you tomorrow,"

I nodded, shutting the door as soon as I was sure that he was not going to get caught in it. I took a deep breath, leaning my forehead against the cool wall beside it. Despite turning down his offer, I probably did need a stiff drink. I needed something.

When I knew that he was definitely not coming back I went into the kitchen for water. Before I could even think about filling a glass there was yet another knock at my door. A different one. An almost rhythmic one.

I stomped back over to the door this time. "Who is it?" I tried not to sound irritated.

"A friend," The voice was eerily familiar. It wasn't Harvey, it wasn't Barbara, it was HIM.

"I don't have any friends," I replied. I shrugged, glancing down at my hands trying to figure out why those words came out of my mouth in that order.

"You have me, let me in," Shivers ran down my spine as he spoke, eliciting more of a response than I wanted to give him. "Please?"

I unlocked the door slowly. My hand found a tight grip on the handle, I twisted it even slowly than I had unlocked the mechanism. I opened the door and waited. My heart was pumping out of my chest. This entire thing was crazy. The pale man who haunted my dreams was about to enter into my apartment while I was alone. Flashes of things that might happen next caused me to break out in a quick, glistening sweat.

He walked in. He stood in front of me with that wicked smile on his face. I swallowed hard. I had no idea what I was thinking. I had no idea what I was even doing.

"Jim," Even the way he said my name, killing me on the inside.

Then it hit me. He _came back._  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will get interesting in the next chapter, very interesting.


	3. Shaped Like Coke

"I told you not to return to Gotham," I muttered, unsure if I was angry or relieved to see him standing in front of me. 

He shuffled his feet, looking down at the floor instead of making eye contact with me. "I know...I...I know that you told me not to come back, but...but I had to come back. You see, all of that stuff that I said before...it...it is true...it is coming true. You know it just as well as I do that it is."

There were so many times in my life where I took took long to react. I always allowed life to pass me by while I tried to think, or occasionally over think, the situation at hand. I had passed up a few good opportunities in my life, especially when I was younger. Not tonight. Tonight I would be in control.

There was something wrong. In our previous encounter his voice was shaky, but this bordered on the extreme. If he really wanted to tell me something so important, he needed to look up. He was not that much shorter than I was, but still.

"How did you know where to find me?" I asked, very curious, in fact, to find out where that information was so easily accessible. 

"I know people, and you are an officer of the law working in this great city, it was not...that difficult." His eyes darted up to mine. Finally. The smoky blue of them cut at me, made me wonder just what he was thinking. "...but...there was another reason that I came to you...came here. It was because I wanted to see you, let you know that my offer is still on the table."

"Your offer?"  _The one where you told me you would be my slave?_

"Yes, and...on my way back to Gotham, well, perhaps you might let me use your shower, a favor for a friend? I would be oh so grateful." 

"Barbara, my fiance, will be home soon,"  _Who was I kidding?_ She wasn't here yet and she was probably not going to be here for hours, as far as I could tell.

"That's fine, I am sure that you can smell me, any time is enough, I am incredibly thankful,"

"Okay," I lead him into the bathroom, grabbing the necessary towels and other items along the way.

"Thank you, Jim," He whispered in a breathy tone, taking the items from me. Our fingers brushed against each other's in a terribly cliched way. The connection gave me tingles and I found myself looking him in the eyes. He was reading me and draining my life force. He bit his bottom lip, seductive eyes still glued on mine. "You know, Jim, you could join me, if you wanted, that is."

My nostrils flared. There was a tight, fluttering in my chest that almost took my breath away. His hauntingly wicked smile was driving me mad, more than before.

"Yes," Slipped from my lips before I could give myself time to decide against it. 

"Yes?" He repeated, most likely out of shock.

"Yes," I latched both of my hands onto the collar of his shirt and backed him up against the counter of the sink.

I moved my legs so that one was in between his thighs. I breathed him in, well aware that pheromones were masking whatever else was on him. I wanted him. Our lips collided in a quick, chaste kiss. It felt weird, but I liked it. I liked it a lot and we had only just begun.

"Yes," He took control. His body was flush against mine and we were kissing once more. This kiss was more intense than the last. My lips parted to the force of his tongue, talented and dancing in the cavern of my mouth. It felt so right that I barely noticed him unbuttoning my shirt.

He slid the shirt off of my shoulders with ease. Instantly after it hit the ground he began working at untucking my undershirt and unzipping my pants. His nimble fingers grabbed a hold of my half hard cock, bringing it completely to life. The way that he worked me, able to figure out just what I wanted, had me grabbing at him without any real plan or control.

"Fuuck..." I muttered, dragging out the word as I allowed my eyes to roll back.

His strangely soft lips lifted off of my neck. "Is there something wrong?"

"There will be if you stop,"

"Hmmm..." He hummed into my jawline before nipping lightly at my ear and exposed collarbone. 

_Barbara had never done anything like this for me, ever._

I stepped away to turn on the shower. Out of the corner of my eyes, I watched Oswald undress. His lean body was exciting to see, a marvelous example of a male. The movements of his muscle and bone beneath his pale skin. Gave me chills. 

There was no denying it now. I was a straight man when I woke up in the morning, but not anymore. I was very much attracted to him. I very much couldn't wait for him to have his gorgeous hands on me.

His eyes ran up and down my naked frame, nervously. It was only then that I realized just how timid he was acting. I had sensed something before, but this truly cemented it. From there I noticed another thing, but I wasn't sure how to bring it up. 

And, I didn't even know where to start when it came to what was between his legs. I had seen my fair share of male genitalia in my time, though his was the first I had given this much thought to. His was longer than mine, but not as thick and his balls were actually quite a bit larger. He was well groomed and it carried my attention rather fluidly. He had been giving off signals of being self conscious, but he had absolutely no reason to be.

I didn't even get the chance to think before he was under the stream of water, a hand on my arm pulling me in with him. The water coated our bodies quickly, giving a sense of cleanliness unique to our strange situation. 

Oswald's smile returned to his pretty face. He batted his eyelashes, fluttering just enough to distract me. When he got the chance, he yanked me toward him. He slowly began to buck his hips into mine as he caught me by the mouth.

His hardness pressed against mine made me want him more. He reached down and wrapped on of his hands around both of our cocks. He stroked us in an even rhythm, making sure the tips touched every so often. My head tipped back as I lost my balance. To steady my weak knees I placed a hand on the small of his back. Only when he picked up sped did I drop my hand a little lower. Just as I suspected, his wonderfully round ass was just the right amount of firm. Pants did him no justice. 

My other hand had a hold of the back of his head. I pushed our foreheads together as he continued to work us both closer to completion. 

"I'm...I'm going to..." The words struggled themselves out of my mouth through a throaty noise that escaped without warning. 

Oswald began to pump his hand even harder. He held himself up with a hand placed on my shoulder. If his breathing had been any indication, he was close as well. 

There was a tightening and a tingling sensation battling for control of my entire body. As everything rushed forward I came into his hand. He followed soon after, causing both of us to collapse into each other. 

"Wow," I gasped in between labored breaths. "That was...unexpected..."

"I do have my other uses," He said back with a wink.

"Yes, yes you do," I whispered. I placed both of my hands on his face and pulled him into a kiss. I had become increasingly comfortable with him now, with these kisses.

***

My head felt clear again. I didn't feel like closing my eyes was going to be the end of me. I was tired and I was aching. I needed to finally rest and allow my body to reset.

I lent Oswald a pair of my pajama pants. He wore them low on his hips causing my eyes to direct right to the indentation that lead down to his manhood. 

I allowed him to lay in my bed. His scarred body fit nicely in the spot previously only used by Barbara. He was beautiful and elegant by the most unique standards. 

"You don't have to answer me, I won't be offended, but if you really don't mind, where did those scars come from?" I was curious about the repeated lines along his arms, legs, and left side. 

He ran one of his hands over the lines on his arm. "Jim, I want to tell you, but I worry it will be all for nothing,"

I laid down on the bed beside him, propped up on my elbow. My free hand reached out to touch him, to feel his scars. I needed to make that connection, because for the first time since the docks I felt whole. 

"I just showered with you, if it is trust then by all means understand that I trust you...for some reason..." I explained. 

He hid a shy smile from me, but I knew his face was flushed. "It is not trust. You spared my life and for that I am eternally grateful, I always will be. That is why I wanted to you to join me in the shower, so that I could repay you. But, you see, these scars are just my coping method. These scars keep me from going on a rampage."

"You cut yourself, then? Am I right?" 

He nodded. "Yes, because sometimes I need to endure pain to make me feel human,"

"That is terrible,"

"Not always, I kind of enjoy the simple sides of pain, the rush of it all. I...I guess...ever since I was young...I would stop if I was able." 

I hated mixed responses. "Maybe, I can fix that?"

He ran a sharped nailed fingertip along my chest. "We will just have to see about that, won't we?"

I rolled over to attempt to fall asleep. He curled up against me, an arm wrapped around my waist and his fingers laced with mine. It had been such a long time since someone had held me, made me feel safe even though they were battling their own demons. I did not believe in soulmates, but I believed this was right. 

I could get used to this. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He is lying. If you read, you understand what he is lying about.


	4. Who Is Labeling Who Around Here?

I wiped the sleep from my eyes. I hadn't felt so refreshed in weeks. The weight I usually carried on my shoulders was remarkably lessened. I rolled over hoping to see my attractive bedfellow sleeping soundly.

He wasn't there. In fact, the other side of the bed was made up completely. The sight tugged on my heart strings a little. I had been dreaming of what this morning would bring. I was going to make him breakfast. 

I walked out of the bedroom. There was a strange tension in the air. I could hear faint voices in the kitchen. If that was not just a bit nerve wracking, I didn't know what was. 

"Jim! So glad that you could join us! How did you sleep?" Oswald asked before taking a sip of whatever was in his mug.

My wide eyes met Barbara's in an awkward exchange. I really found myself wanting to know exactly when she got home last night. 

"Good morning, when did you get in? I don't think I heard you." I said with false confidence.

"Just a few hours ago. I slept at a friend's house because I didn't feel safe driving home. When I got in I was greeted by your friend, Peter, sitting in the living room."

"Peter?" I muttered. "Yes, he came over last night and we talked about work. Peter is an undercover cop."  _Grasping at straws here._ I hoped he would go along with my story.

"That is right. We are working on a very important case. It is based nearby, so I...I came to visit Jim." Oswald, Peter, continued. I had a hard time keeping a straight face.

"C'mon, Jim, come sit and enjoy the morning with us?" Barbara suggested. I couldn't though, it felt like too much of a trap.

"No, no, I...need to get ready for work." I stammered, thoughts rushing to my head painfully as  _Peter_ winked at me. 

Today would be interesting, at best.

***

Work felt much longer than usual. It probably didn't help any that Commissioner Loeb came to visit. When he arrived at my desk, I knew instantly that he was there to ruin my day. 

I can handle Loeb.

I can't handle Loeb, Montoya, and Allen all at the same time. They might have been here to arrest me for the murder I allegedly committed.

"Detective Gordon?" Loeb said my name with a bit of anger laced deep within his tone. 

I spun around to face him. "Yes, Commissioner?"

"Could you join me in the other room? I need to speak with you in private."

Harvey, my new savior, stepped in. "Commissioner, is this urgent? Detective Gordon and I were just about to head out to a crime scene on the Arkham grounds." 

"Yes, well, I suppose that I can wait. Hurry on."

I followed Harvey out into the front entrance. I was actually wondering if there was a legitimate crime scene. That certainly would have helped. 

Harvey disappeared for a moment, without any warning whatsoever. When I looked back up from the ground, I was completely surrounded by large men. I tried to remain calm, even though I knew for a fact that I was about to be beaten or kidnapped and that it was going to happen right in front of where I worked. My fight or flight had long since kicked into gear, but I couldn't wrap my head around why this was going to be allowed right in front of the G.C.P.D, so it was getting stunted.

I did have experience in escaping scenarios such as this, but I apparently had decided not to recall any of that at the moment. "Now, hold on just a minute..."

Something clocked me in the head.

And, I blacked out. 

***

My blindfold was removed by a brute who didn't care that his dirty fingernail had slipped directly into my eyeball in the process. I was tied to the chair they had sat me down in, so it was not like I was able to fight back in any way as it was.

"It is alright. You can untie him now. He is not a threat." I turned my head in the direction of the man speaking. It was the Don Maroni. Since Sal was the brains behind this, I already knew that I was in for a ridiculous chain of events.

"Why am I here, Mr. Maroni?" I asked. 

"You are here because your friend, The Penguin, here told me an interesting story and, even though I like interesting stories, you are going to have to confirm if it is true or not, if I can trust him or not." He explained. 

"What do you want me to tell you about, Oswald,  _The Penguin_?" I asked with my hands in a steeple.

"Tell me how you met The Penguin," 

Just then, another man lead Oswald to the table, allowing him to sit down beside me. He tried not to show it, but I could see the smile in his eyes. 

"I met Mr. Cobblepot here when I first visited his previous employer, Fish Mooney. She had information that was allegedly supposed to help with the Wayne murders. She didn't, by the way, not really anyways. She set up a fall guy with Falcone. Mr. Cobblepot relayed this information to the police after the fall guy was wrongfully killed by my partner and I. Because of this, Falcone wanted Mr. Cobblepot killed for being a traitor. We arranged it to happen at the docks, which is where I spared him." 

Maroni bust out laughing. His hearty chuckle was a bit comforting, but I found it to be weirdly inappropriate. Plus, I couldn't tell if it was a happy, trustful laugh or a murderous one. "Good to hear,"

"Oh, thank goodness," Oswald said with a sigh of relief, his hand patting the top of mine. He mouthed an additional 'thank you'.

"I understand completely. I get it. Love is love, love is beautiful, enjoy it for all of its gifts, don't waste it. I see why he brought you in for this." Maroni smiled. 

_Oswald wanted me brought here?_

Oswald pulled his hand away. "It is not like that at all, Don Maroni. James Gordon and I are only friends. I am only very grateful for his kindness towards me." 

Maroni nodded, but he didn't say a word.

I let what Oswald said sink in. I didn't care for it too much. Yes, I was technically engaged to Barbara, but there was that whole thing with the shower and the hauntingly beautiful criminal who shared it with me. 

 _Was I chopped liver?_  

I was past the point of being just his friend.

***

Maroni allowed me to leave soon after that. I couldn't have been happier. Even as a detective I did like some peaceful days, maybe I should say ESPECIALLY as a detective.

As I was walking out, Oswald stopped me. He grabbed my arm, showing off his unbelievable strength. He dragged me right into the bathroom of the restaurant and pressed his lips against mine. A fit of passion so remarkable that I was sure I wouldn't be able to walk away from it normal.

"So, it really is like that?" I giggled.  _Like a fucking schoolgirl. Dumbass._

"I'm...I'm sorry, Jim...I just...I had to...I can't even...I can't even handle being in the same room with you...without wanting to jump your bones..." He whispered softly into my ear before pressing a kiss against that miraculously sensitive spot on my jaw.

"You're something else,"

"Only around you," His wonderful hands pushed away my blazer so that he could get a tighter grip on my waist. 

My face went flush as all of my blood rushed through my body to places it was more useful. "Mmm...does that mean that we might replay what happened in my shower the other night?" 

He laced his fingers with mine. "Sometime...I suppose..."

He stopped kissing me abruptly. He pulled away, using the most calculated restraint. Apparently, what he wanted to do was give me blue balls and then leave me hanging in the stall. 

Worse things could have happened today,  _I suppose._


	5. I Bet You Didn't Know That I Was Dangerous

"Jim, you asshole!" Barbara shouted at me when I walked through the door. I had narrowly avoided getting hit in the head by the book she chucked in my direction.

"What the hell did I do!?" I shouted back at her, slamming the door only for the drama of it. I wasn't exactly angry just yet.  _YET._

"You're a bastard!" She was screaming now and still had yet to give me a reason as to why this was happening. 

Of course, I had about a million and one things running through my head already. I definitely did not need all of this. I was days from potentially being arrested. 

"Why am I a bastard, exactly?!" My voice kept getting louder and louder, even though there was no legitimate reason for it to do so.

"You are cheating on me!" As soon as the words came out of her mouth I was drenched in a cold sweat. She had found out about Oswald and I.  _Did he leave something behind in our bathroom?_

"I am not!"

"Then what took you so long to get home today?" She placed her hands on her hips. "Hmm?"

"I was with Harvey,"  _I'm a dirty, rotten liar on top of being a cheater who may or may not be gay._ "We are working on a really big case. Almost the entire precinct is involved with this one."

"Dear god, Jim, you should see your face, I'm only joking. Just messing with you so that I could see if you were up to something." She explained before bursting into maniacal laughter. 

"WHAT!?" Funny how I was now the one who sounded angry.

"I'm sorry," 

I had to shake my head. I picked the book up off the floor. I walked past her and dropped down on the sofa. My fiance was an insane woman, absolutely insane. 

"I said I was sorry,"

"Yes, I heard you, it is all fine," My mind was beginning to wander. All I could think about was Oswald. I cared about him. I wanted to share parts of my life with him that I hadn't shared with anyone else. He was definitely not thinking the same things that I was, he most likely thought of me as a friend with benefits or something, but I hoped we could both get there.

***

 _I had to see him._ I just needed to see him and have him in my arms. The more time we spent apart, the more I couldn't stand it. 

So, this time, I was the one who went looking. I took it into my own hands to seek him out.

He was with his mother, Gertrud Kapelput. She was the one who answered the door when I knocked. She seemed like a sweet woman, a little off, but sweet. Now, I understood where Oswald got it from. She was weirdly adorable. 

I walked right over to Oswald the second that I could see him. I crossed the room and grabbed him by the wrists, giving him a light peck on the cheek. He acted cold. I hated it. 

"Jim, will you be joining us in the knook for tea?" Gertrud asked.

"Yes, of course, Ms. Cobblepot, I would like nothing more,"

"Kapelput," She corrected me. Oswald just rolled his eyes. 

The three of us sat down at the small table with an elegant, old European set up. The cold criminal loosened up a bit and reached under the table to place a hand on my thigh and give me a nice squeeze. 

"Mother, this is Detective James Gordon, he is the one that I told you about," He said shakily.

"Oh," She clasped her hands together excitedly. "James Gordon! The Detective! I am so happy that you have come into my beautiful son's life. So, so happy. I worried he would never find someone."

Oswald covered his face with his palms in embarrassment. I took that to mean that I wasn't supposed to know what he said to her. Cute. 

"I am really happy to have him as a part of my life as well. Things just have not been the same since he entered my life. I never want to know what life is like without him." I told Oswald's awkward, yet charming, mother.

Oswald was still beet red. I had no idea that he thought so much of me. I only knew that I thought that much of him.

"Wonderful! You can't even begin to understand how much happier he is. Does my heart good." 

I took Oswald's hands in mine. After a few moments of reassuring touching, he finally decided to lay his head on my shoulder. The same calming feeling washed over me again, just as it had when he laid in my bed. I accepted it as a sign.

"Mother, will you excuse us for a moment? I would very much like to show Detective Gordon around the house." Well, he said that with an incredible amount of ease in his voice.

"Oh yes, run along, but don't be too long,"

Once again, I found myself at the beck and call of Oswald's hand. It had become rather frequent that that he had my arm and was taking me to another room, off on another adventure. 

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Upstairs," He said, looking back at me momentarily.

I followed, though it was not like I really had a choice. We quickly scaled up the stairs to the second floor and into the big master bathroom. He sat down on the edge of the antique clawfoot tub, smiling suggestively at me.

"Seriously? With your mother down stairs? She will hear. She said for us to not be gone that long."

"I think I am being incredibly serious...I...I...could not be more serious." He untucked his shirt, beginning to unbutton it. How was I supposed to say no to that?

"Oh heavens..." I trailed off as he used his body as a distraction. There went my blood flow. Nothing like the sight of his pale skin and the small line of dark hair leading downward to drive me wild.

He slowly removed his belt and then his pants. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. Even him turning on the water was sexy.

I took off all of my shirts. I joined him beside the bathtub, calculating every move I made. His ghost like radiance lit up in the lovely bathroom. With one swooping motion, I had him cradled in my arms. He held on tightly with his arms around my neck. Those enchanting eyes were locked onto mine. He made me want to get into all kinds of trouble with him.

We shared a quick kiss before I sat him down in the filling bathtub. As I attempted to let go, he pulled me down on top of him, splashing warm water everywhere and soaking my sock feet and pants. 

I shouted out of shock. He grabbed my face and pulled me into the most passionate lip lock we had shared to date. This kiss, this kiss was love if I had any idea what love actually was. 

"Ya know, I am going to need to dry my pants before I leave now," I laughed. 

He finished peeling my wet clothes from my bottom half. "That's fine, Jim, you will be here for a long while,"

"Is that so?"

He moved so that I was pushed down on my back. His legs squeezed tightly on either side of my body. When he leaned forward, his hands grazed over my nipples. If I hadn't already had a throbbing erection, I certainly would have one now. 

He slid down off of me so that we were laying side by side in tight quarters. He still had one leg wrapped around me, but now he also had a hand on my hard dick. 

"Completely,"

"You have a water fetish, don't you?" I asked.

He simply smiled at me and continued to stroke.


	6. You Have A Talent For The Terrible

Ms. Kapelput insisted I stay for dinner. I did. She kept laughing at the two of us, uncomfortably. I guess walking into your bathroom and witnessing your son and his lover(?) in the bathtub while said son is jerking said lover(?) off can be sort of unnerving. I tried to ignore it. It was kind of awful.

What was more awful was that I didn't want to leave. I wanted to spend the night in his bed. I didn't care what we did. We could talk, fool around, sleep, it didn't matter. Just to be near him was enough.

I might just be in love with him. No, scratch that, I was almost certain that I was in love with him. 

I would, at least, do absolutely anything for him.

"How about we go on a real date...maybe...s...sometime? I...I...could decided if I want to keep you." Oswald chuckled before kissing me what I imagined was a goodbye kiss. 

"Of course, how about the Japanese place on main and twelfth, tomorrow at eight?"

His eyes seemed a bit larger, probably surprised that I had agreed to be with him in public. That, and the fact that he was supposed to be dead. _Maybe this wasn't a good idea after all?_

"I will pick you up," I added.

He still didn't make any efforts to speak to me.

"What, don't like sushi?" I joked.

"No, no, I actually love it. I...I...just don't think that we should go anywhere where I am not protected, anywhere that is not owned by Maroni."

He had a point. A really, very good point.

"Right, okay, well, I will still pick you up at the same time and we can go to one of his places, but it will still be a date." I decided.

He nodded. "That would be nice...I...I...I've been dying to get inside your head."

I kissed his forehead before leaving. I did have to go home every once in a while.

***

"Jim?" Harvey broke my day dream in his typical fashion.

I looked up when he slammed a file down on my desk. He had a smile on his face though, so it couldn't have been that bad. I quickly skimmed through it to get a basic idea of what was inside.

The evidence included was going to put away a serial killer who had been on the run for almost a decade. It was fantastic. Now, I knew why Harvey was smiling.

"Detective James Gordon, you are under arrest for the murder of Oswald Cobblepot," Montoya said, coming up behind me with every intention of putting handcuffs on me.  _Oh fuck._

I stood up from my chair. I wasn't going to turn into a blooming idiot and resist being taken into custody. I allowed her to put the handcuffs on me. I would figure out what to do.

Harvey didn't say anything. Since he had been doing such a good job at being the savior I was wondering what my partner's plan of action actually was. 

Whatever forces controlled my universe were looking out for me at that moment. Oswald burst into the doors of the police department with his arms open wide and a ridiculously wicked smile on his face. I was very happy to see him.

"Hello, Gotham City's finest, my name is Oswald Cobblepot and I am here to give you all some very interesting information...the first...being...I am not dead."

I didn't even have to look in Harvey's direction to know that he was shooting daggers at me. Everyone who was in on the original plan let out a gasp. Renee Montoya unlocked my handcuffs and turned towards Oswald with the same confusion mixed with shock and sprinkled with amazement that everyone else was.

"You've unlocked the handcuffs, now, can you let go of me?" I asked Montoya quietly.

She released me from her grasp, which in reality I should not have had her do in the first place. My autopilot switched on and I immediately crossed the room to get to Oswald. My instincts were telling me to reach out and pull him into some sort of embrace, but I was already in hot water with my colleagues. So, with what little brain function I had left, I simply stood beside him. 

"How come you have been missing this whole time?" Allen asked. 

"That does not much matter...all that matters is that I am here now."

The powers that be took Oswald with him for further questioning, leaving me to escape to the lockers without any disruptions. I quickly gathered my things ready to just go home with no intentions of dealing with Harvey, or anyone else. 

But, since I had so much luck earlier, that wasn't the case. Harvey cornered me, forcing me down onto a bench.

"What the hell, Jim!?" He shouted.

I looked up at him. "I couldn't kill him, Harvey, it was wrong,"

"You...that is beside the point! You didn't have a choice! This was not a matter for you to decide to have morals on!"

I was pretty sure that he was going to hit him. I restrained him by the wrists to save me from the blow to the face. "If I would have killed him, I would be going to prison right now for his murder. Regardless of what Falcone and Loeb say I would probably be convicted. It was the right thing to do, allowing Oswald Cobblepot to live. I would do it again if I had the chance..."

"You have betrayed my trust, Jim. I don't know if I will be able to trust you ever again. I can barely look at you right now."

Mostly because I was cut off, I had every intention of spilling my guts to him right then and there. In fact, I was going to because I had already been so exposed today. 

"I don't have to explain myself to you, I don't have to tell you anything, but...since we are here...I have been having trouble with Barbara, because I am in love with someone else."

"It isn't me, is it? Because that is flattering and all and I suppose that you are a good looking guy or something, but I just don't swing that way, and they will eat you alive if they find out you go like that around here,"

"It is not you. Conceited." I laughed to lighten the mood. 

"Is it a guy though? I kinda feel like it is. You have been doing more stuff to your hair lately."

"That doesn't even make sense,"

"It doesn't have to,"

"Does that mean that you aren't going to hate me?" I asked.

"I haven't actually decided yet,"


	7. Watch Me Corrupt You

I had never been so anxious in my entire life. Conveniently, Barbara had gone away to see her parents that weekend, so there was really nothing to get in my way. This first date was supposed to be incredible. And, since it was almost like starting on the fourth or fifth date it had to go off without a hitch. 

I knocked on his door, waiting patiently for someone to answer. Ms. Kapelput greeted me with a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. She brought me into the foyer of the house. Oswald came down the stairs, dressed in something that was much more expensive than mine, walking in a way that aided the injury that gave him his other name. In all of his imperfection, he was perfect. It all started and ended with his soul melting smile.

"Well hello," I said in greeting as soon as he was in good earshot.

We shared a quick peck and headed to my car. Now that he was near me, a lot of my nerves had calmed.

Like a true gentleman, I opened the passenger side door for him to enter. Then I got in and we were on our way. 

"Did you enjoy just how I made our date easier? So that we could go exactly where you wanted to go?" He asked after a few moments of strange silence.

"I did. You also saved me from getting arrested, which if I had been would have put a big damper on our date."

"I am much smarter than I appear," He chuckled, reaching a hand over to touch my thigh.

"Mmmhmm...yes you are,"

"Do you think that I don't look smart?"  _Dear god, it was a trap. Son of a bitch._

"No, no...NO!" I shouted. 

"I am just fucking with you," He smiled, wickedly. "I have been wondering, Jim, about your fiance?"

 _Honestly, so had I._ "What do you mean?"

"Are we just fooling around h-here? A-are...you going to marry Ms. Kean? What am I to you?"  _That was a lot to handle._

I really didn't need to even think about it. I already had been for days. I already knew how I felt about him. I knew what I wanted from him. 

I was going to tell him, even if it made him run for the hills. 

"Do you want me to be honest?" I asked.

"Yes," He muttered, confidence gone.

"I don't think we are just fooling around. I love you. I really love you. I would very much like for you to be my boyfriend, since you are basically already my lover." I told him, feeling myself blush. 

"Ooh, boyfriend?" He repeated the word, almost sounding sarcastic.

"Well, don't ask the question if you are going to knock the answer,"

He leaned his head on my shoulder, presumably apologetically. "I'm sorry, I simply only have ever been involved with p-eople who want me...as only someone to fool around with. H-Hearing boyfriend was just a bit of a surprise."

"I'll take that as a compliment then,"

"You should, because I love you," He clamped a hand over his mouth.

"What!?" I asked as I pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant. I had prepared for the worst, prepared for Oswald to not be that kind of guy.

"I love you," He said again.

"I love you, too,"

***

Whatever had gotten into me was a good thing. I felt confident and powerful with Oswald on my arm. He lifted me up. We were like the Prince of Darkness and his Mistress. He being the Prince, of course. My Goth Prince.

Barbara was out of town, something I kept reminding myself, so I was going to take advantage of this.

The hose lead us to a table towards the back. We took our seats and began to look over the menus. I found it hard to start a conversation. I had no idea what to say. I already felt like I knew him so well. It was insane, and perfect, and magnificently incredible.

"Jim,"

"Yes, Oswald?"

"Y-you are a bit quiet,"

"I don't know where to start,"

"Anywhere is fine, ask me a question,"

"Okay," I gave him a half smile. "What is your favorite color?"

"Purple, same as yours, now ask me something that actually matters," He said, grabbing my hands. 

"When was the last time you cut yourself?"

"The day...before I came to find you," He spoke softly, pulling a hand back to rub at his itchy wrist. 

"Really?" That made me feel special.

"Yeah, e...e-ever since we have been d-doing whatever this is, I have felt whole,"

_I guess that makes two of us._

"Words cannot express how that makes me feel," I took a deep breath. "Man, that's really powerful, no one has, I have never impacted anyone else that much before,"

"Okay, calm down, Jim, it is not like I...I haven't...I didn't tell you that you cured cancer or anything that big."

The waiter, who was so insignificant I almost mistook him for the host since they looked so horrifically similar, approached the table and took our order. I was having trouble focusing on anything, but Oswald. The way he was smiling, trying not to look directly at me, I loved it.

He pulled a rather convenient pen out of his pocket. He carefully, almost meticulously, unfolded it just enough so that he would be able to write on it. He then proceeded to scribble down some sort of note. 

I felt silly, but I was really excited when he passed the note to me across the table.

It only said two words and hand a bit of punctuation at the end. Only a total of ten letters involved. I had to admit, I really enjoyed what it said. It was a cheaper alternative. 

_Skip dinner?_

When I looked up from the note he was drenched in seductive with his eyes locked on mine. He was biting his bottom lip, he waited for me to answer. 

"We already ordered,"

One of his feet, shoeless I might add, was running up the inside of my leg in response.

"Alright. Alright. Let's at least get it to go then?" I suggested. He didn't have a choice in that matter.


	8. Can You Hear Me Knocking

Oswald and I didn't waste any time. As fast as the two of us could move in between lusty kisses and his hobble we got up to the apartment. Before anyone could think twice the food had been thrown down on the counter and we had become some sort of mess on the sofa.

It was different than the other times that we had been this close. Something was definitely different this time. 

Every movement expressed a certain type of power in it. The roughness that had left us naked in the shower and the bathtub had been replaced with gentle passion backed by his obvious experience. It was definitely interesting.

His hands seemed to instinctively know just where to touch me. In only a few minutes I had wanted to be released from my pants that had gotten increasingly tight. His crafty ways had me dying to know what would happen next. 

"You sir, are a dirty, naughty, little one," I laughed.

His lips were on mine in an instant. His long fingers finally released my throbbing cock from its imprisonment. I moaned into his mouth as he stroked me gently.

He crawled on top. Straddling me now, he stripped me of all of my clothes, throwing them on either side of the sofa we were laying on. I struggled to assist him in removing his, but I was ultimately useless.

When we were both finally naked, I was frozen. He slid down the length of my body and his mouth found my shaft. His tongue began at the base, working up to the top. 

_Fuck._

Without warning, he wrapped his entire mouth around my dick. His lips were tight as he bobbed his head up and down in between my legs. This alone, was probably going to kill me.

Oswald hummed, perfectly destroying all of my hopes of keeping out of my headspace. He moved down to my balls, his focus back on teasing me.

I grabbed him by the hair, yanking him back to my level. I caught him in a lip lock. My nails clawed down his back, he began grinding his hips into mine, our shafts touching at full lengths. 

That was what threw me over the edge. I had to have him. I wanted to be inside of him, if he was going to go that far, of course.

"Umm..." I whispered. "Oswald,"

He lifted his head away from the spot of my neck that had become a favorite of his. "Yes, Jim?"

"Could I...maybe we could..." I really did not know how to word it.

"Mm..I think I know what you are trying to say...b-but..."

I moved my arms around his neck. "But what?"

"Can we...can we take it slow?" He asked timidly. Now, I was curious.

"You were sucking my dick and now you want to slow down?"

His dark eyes glared at me. He swung his leg off of me and began to collect his clothes. "Forget it,"

I just couldn't let him leave. I made him angry, but we could get past that. He was just too beautiful to allow to walk away. I would make up for my mistake because I loved him.

I quickly got up, needing to keep him close. I caught him in an embrace, holding him tightly so he couldn't escape my grasp.

"You are not going anywhere," I whispered.

"No! Let me go! Now!" He shouted, trying to pull away from me.

"I'm not letting go," I placed a kiss on the back of his neck. "I am never letting go."

Oswald finally gave up. He spun around in my arms, laying his head down on my chest. "Fine,"

"That's better, isn't it?" 

He nuzzled against me, but he didn't say a word. 

"I love you, Oswald. I didn't mean to offend you. That was not my intention at all, I promise. If what I said hurt you, I apologize and will continue to apologize again and again until it is alright. Just please sit down."

He nodded. I laced my fingers with his and lead him back to the sofa. 

"I am sorry that I overreacted," He muttered.

I brought his chin up and gave him a light kiss. "Don't. I only want to know what is wrong. I am the one who should be apologizing."

He wouldn't make direct eye contact with me, almost as if he was ashamed of the reasons he had. 

"I...I am not sure if I c-can t-tell you..."

"Whatever it is, I can handle it,"

"I...when I was younger...my mother had this friend...h-he-he, I just do not know if I c-can...I need you to be slow,"

 _Oh god._ "I see,"

"I am sorry,"

"You really are the last person who needs to be saying that you're sorry," I put an arm around his shoulders, allowing him to rest his head on mine. "And, nothing has to happen that you don't want. We can just go to bed, cuddle."

Those luscious lips found a home on my jawline. Unexpected, based on the situation. "Thank you,"

"No problem,"

***

Oswald and I had fallen asleep on the sofa. When I woke up, sleeping in an upright sitting position, which is anything, but comfortable, I saw that he was no longer at my side. He was almost ninja like when he moved away from me, something I found to be a miracle for several reasons. He would be able to sneak up on a mouse.

"Oswald?" I called out. "Oswald? Are you still here?" I looked around, desperately trying to see with my tired eyes.

Before another word could come out of my mouth I had a mug full of hot liquid shoved into my hands. The scent of French roast coffee filled my nose. My senses began to function at full capacity once more, allowing me to look at a sleepy, bed headed Oswald.

"Was I wrong t-to assume black, Detective?" He asked me in a voice that was just dripping with sultry undertones. Sure, he had clearly been awake at least a few minutes longer than I had, but his voice still sounded like sleep. Something that in turn make him sound like sex.

"No, not wrong at all," I told him, patting the space beside me.

He joined me, holding his own mug and snuggling against me. Right where he should be. "You are sort of predictable,"

"Predictable? I'm predictable? I am predictable? How so?"

"There is no need to get all defensive, Jim. We a-all h-have our predictable...qualities." He stifled a giggle. _Brat._

"I know that, but why did you say it?"

"Why not? It is true?"

I playfully hit him in the shoulder, but I was not giving him the satisfaction of getting a response.

***

"DId you hear about Detective Gordon?" I swore I heard those words. It was the second time since I arrived at the station. I wasn't sure what it was in reference to, but I was going to find out.

I didn't have time to be off in my head.

"Army guys are like that,"

"Where did you hear that?"

"It is obvious, most soldiers are men,"

"That is insane,"

"It is also statistically inaccurate. Gender preference does not lead someone to pick a path of patriotism by joining the army." Edward Nygma, so far my only supporter, said in the midst of yet another conversation that I was the main topic of.

At least now I was beginning to get a feel of what all of this nonsense was about. I also knew that there was at least a seventy percent chance of me smacking Harvey upside the head.

_Why couldn't this have just been talk about me not killing Oswald?_

I kept my head up. Having predetermined that I was at risk of being bullied by my closed minded co-workers. I was able to be on the defense before they went on attack. I had never been exposed to this extent. This was going to be quite an interesting day.

"At least we know why he is so weird now,"  _Oh gee, thanks._

"It is a damn shame about his poor fiancee though, beautiful girl getting with a guy like him. I wonder if she knows? Poor girl. I will have to make sure that I am there to comfort her."

I figured it was like this. I only had two options in this situation. On one hand, I was able to sit back and remain quiet. I could basically pretend that I didn't have ears at all. On the other hand, I had the opportunity to embrace it. I could be that guy, even though I was in no way a stereotypical one, and play it off to my advantage. The latter being useful since I could play the discrimination card on anyone I felt looked at me the wrong way.

But, alas, that was not the kind of man I was. I didn't blackmail or target anyone for fun. If I was going to do it, I needed a genuine purpose. Right now, my only genuine purpose was to get through the work day without throwing a fist. It was going to be quite a test of my restraint and my will power. 

"Jim, can I have a word with you in my office?" Essen called.

I held up a finger to signal that I would go to her in a minute. There was something I had to take care of.

It turned out that I was not nearly as strong as I thought. This awful behemoth asshole from narcotics, Arnold Flask was being particularly noisy and obnoxious about my recent 'outing'. He shouted and ranted about like a typical moron. He wanted me to hear him. I wanted him to feel ridiculous for speaking about something that he really knew little of. 

"Flask," I said with clenched fists. "Do you mind running that all by me again?" 

"Which part?" He asked me with spite in his tone.

"The last two or three points that you made,"

"You mean the ones where I called you a disgusting faggot who had no business being in a male dominated police force? Or the ones where I so kindly suggested that you be partnered with a female and all the men around here would have to wear long coats?" 

"All of it, really, because I am not so sure that I completely understand where you stand on the subject: are you also a faggot? Is that how you know so much, like just how to treat my situation? Is that it? Or, are you just too much of a neanderthal to realize how incredibly stupid you actually sound?" My anger, my rage all bubbled up to the surface like clockwork. I had the sudden, but undeniable urge to punch him right in the nose. I wanted to see red in the most literal sense. 

"What did you just call me, faggot?" He asked, puffing out his chest like he was trying to establish that he was the true alpha male. 

"Oh, you didn't hear me!? Let me refresh your memory!" I pulled back and threw hard. My clenched fist connected with his nose and cheekbone just heavy enough to make a decent impact on him.

If anyone was establishing a pecking order, it ought to be me. I was a greenhorn for all intent and purpose, but I knew how to leadership the hell out of a group of people when given the chance.

"Let that be a lesson to anyone who thinks it is okay to go behind someone else's back and call them a faggot," I announced, deciding to take a cocky bow for Ed's benefit since he had the weirdest almost shit eating grin on his face as he was watching this all unfold.

"Detective Gordon!"  _Oh yes, that's right, I was supposed to go visit her in her office._

Since I was already definitely, probably in some sort of trouble, I joined her without an ounce of hesitation. There was no real point in avoiding the inevitable. 

"Why on earth did you just punch Flask in the face?" She asked.

I shuffled my feet. "Because he called me a fag," Apparently, it was only now that I realized just how childish this all was. 

"Is this some kind of joke? Because earlier today I had two members of homicide, I won't mention any names, requested to be moved away from you since these claims have been moving through that you are a 'fag'. What is going on?"

"Was that the original reason that you wanted to speak with me?"

"Only in part. You do know that there is a zero tolerance policy for harassment in the workforce. You could have avoided being in that situation with Flask if you would have come to me first. Know this, I can't stop him from filing a complaint."

"I know,"

"This is Flask, you know what he is capable of,"

"I do. What I did was very stupid and I apologize for acting so rash, but I am not a fan of his particular choice of words. Unless I come out and tell everyone I am one and it is okay to call me one, I do not want to hear that garbage." I was stern and my stance remained firm.

"That is all beside the point right now,"

I nodded. "Fair enough, now what was the other thing that you needed to speak with me about?" 

"I would like for you and Bullock to meet with Harvey Dent for help on solving the Dinali case, he dealt with Dinali right before he originally went missing." She explained. 

"Right. Right. Sure."

_Was the day over yet? Close to being over? This was getting really stupid._

 


	9. White Lights and Dark Nights

There was something just a bit magical about coming home to a fresh cooked meal set up with a romantic place setting. Candles and everything. It was even better because it was him.

We were obviously going to take advantage of our last night without Barbara. 

"Welcome home," He said in a sultry sing-song voice, greeting me at the door with a sweet kiss.

"It is good to be home, like you have no idea," I sighed. 

We sat at the dining table. Whatever this strange concoction was in front of me, it smelled delicious. Something zesty. I was down to try it.

"Do you want to talk about it?" 

"Kind of. Yeah."

"Spill...I...I...am all ears,"

"It is going around the G.C.P.D that I am a faggot and I took it too harshly and I punched a guy. It is just, I really hate being labeled like that. I know I overreacted, but he kept going on and on. He drove me crazy, to the absolute brink. He had no right to call me that! To say I needed to be with a female partner so I would not look...I don't even know, but I am definitely going to be suspended."

"Suspended? F-For being called...a faggot and def-fending yourself? That is preposterous."

"I know, I know, but I hit him and I should have resisted, should have simply filed a complaint or something of the sort."

"Maybe, but I think it is sexy, almost as if you were defending my honor, since I am indeed a faggot." _That was not okay._ Not at all. I couldn't tell if he was being serious, sarcastic, or some other third thing.

"What?"

"I'm a faggot, you know that, you basically are one too," He rolled his eyes. "Or maybe I am wrong! M-maybe it is just me and you are playing me. I am just a fool."

I took his hands in mine. "No, that isn't even funny. Oswald, I love you. I want to be with you. But, you better believe I am going to knock the teeth in of anyone who calls you or I any derogatory names. I will not stand for it!" 

He bit his bottom lip. I was starting to feel like he had just played me like a fool. He did think it was sexy. He wanted the rage fueled side of me to come out and be his hero. He also wanted that rage for some other thing, at least that was how I took it.

"You son of a bitch," I chuckled, taking another bite of the insanely tasty masterpiece he created. "This is incredible, by the way,"

"Thank you, I'm glad that you like it because it is one of the only five dishes that I can cook."

"Oh yeah? Well, that is more than me."

Oswald got up and walked around the table. He sat down in my lap, where he fit quite nicely, and turned just enough so that he could kiss me. I wrapped an arm around his petite waist and held him close. 

His hands had other ideas, however.

He undid the front of my pants, putting his hand completely inside. Once he had full access he began to stroke me in his wicked way. My half alert manhood sprang to life under his unforgiving touch. I liked where this was going. 

He kept his eyes locked onto mine. No matter what he occupied his hands with he was always looking directly at me. There was an almost demonic look in his stormy blues. Almost as unnerving as it was exciting. 

Suddenly, he ceased all contact with me, physical anyways. With one eyebrow raised he walked backwards a few steps. He spun around so that his back was toward me and went straight to my bedroom.

If it was possible, I liked this whole thing a little more now.

I stood up and zipped up my pants over my painfully hard cock. I followed Oswald's path to my bedroom, knowing full well that he was probably going to take this opportunity to jump me.

I walked through the threshold, cautiously looking around. The door was slammed shut behind me just as soon as I was clear from being hit with it. Oswald, already without a shirt, pressed me against it in a fiery heat of passion with his lips doing all of the work.

"Hi," he muttered, grinding his hips into mine.

I was dying for his hand to finally make contact. It was what I did most desire at that moment. As he quickly shed me of my clothes the desire grew, almost crippling me from the craving.

His hand finally reached down to touch me, but only to tease me further. He ran his finger from the base to the tip and simply went back to his other plans.

Without a single word he had latched his mind blowing hand in a tight grasp around the tie that he cleverly left around my neck. He lead me to the bed, pulling me down right on top of him. 

My lips explored his pale skin to the full extent. I tasted every exposed area that I could get to. His soft cries drove me further into this relentless madness that was only worsened by his long fingers in my hair. 

I moved lover. I took a firm hold of his hips and began to trace a line from his belly button to his erection with quick, delicious kisses. My mouth found a healthy spot on the inside of his thigh, not a scar in sight. My right hand slipped from his hip, taking his shaft so that I could give him a proper payment for all the times before. I stroked him while I nibbled away at his soft skin to the sound of wonderful moans.

I would be lying if I said that I did not know my way around a dick. I did have one, if that made a difference. I used my own memory of what felt good as I took his dick inside my mouth. He was more than a little surprised.

He watched me with wide eyes, pupils completely blown as he absentmindedly went back to running his fingers in my hair. I bobbed my head up and down, using my tongue more effectively every time I was close to the tip.

His back arched up as he cried out for me to stop.

I glanced up at him, barely resisting the urge to pump the hard cock in my hand. "Why?"

"Because I am going to cum, and I really don't want to yet,"

He was maneuvering himself into a more dominant position before I could even respond. He had me on my back effortlessly, straddling me with his finely toned legs.

He reached behind his back and grabbed my neglected shaft. With his spare hand he positioned my own hands so that one was on his hip and the other partially in his mouth.

After my fingers were wet to his liking, he leaned forward and placed my hand on his ass. I took the hint and slid my index finger inside slowly. He hissed, but insisted that I continue.

I worked my finger in and out of Oswald's tight hole. After one became inadequate, I added a second, picking up the pace as he broke into a shimmery sweat. Feeling restless, I placed the third alongside them, just as he had silently gestured above me before entering his head space.

I wanted him. Sooner, not later.

"Take me," His seductive voice was right on cue.

He moved back, positioning himself over my dick. He took the tip and lead it inside his entrance. Slowly, he impaled himself on me. His velvet heat wrapped around me was unlike anything I had ever experienced.

Oswald felt right. We fit together perfectly. The warmth of his hole was more incredible than anyone before him. There was no comparison. Definitely better than any woman.

He rocked his hips back and forth. He had me right where he wanted me. As he moved faster, my toes curled and I almost forgot to make an effort. He lifted his hips up, only very slightly releasing my cock, then he slammed down hard. I needed to come back down to earth.

I put my hands back securely on his hips. I thrusted upwards to get even deeper into him. He leaned back into my thrusts, making sure I hit his prostate again and again.

He grabbed the base of his cock, beginning to jerk himself to completion. I moved his hand away, replacing it with mine. I picked up the pace. I pulled him in close, sitting upwards so we could be eye to eye.

Finally, the fire in my center most core released, filling Oswald's perfect ass with my cum. It felt like it had been such a long time since I had experienced such an incredible orgasm.

Oswald came right after. He fell into my arms, catching me in a series of sloppy, sleepy kisses.

"You are suitable," He giggled, half conscious.

 "And that means what, exactly?"

"You...fuck like a champion, James," He leveled his breathing. "I think...you c-could handle...something a little less than this vanilla...fuck..."

I kissed his forehead. "Okay, whatever you say,"

"Goodnight, James Gordon," He muttered before snuggling against my chest.

"Goodnight, Oswald Cobblepot,"

***

The first time I actually woke up with Oswald since we first began our strange, forbidden relationship was so much better than any connection we had made before, almost. His naked frame pressed against my body with the sunshine beating down on his face. I was much deeper than I ever imagined I would be.

He moaned into my chest as he awoke. His hand moved from my waist to my cheek, caressing it lovingly. He lightly smacked me before crawling on top, pressing his head into my chest. 

I ran my fingers through his jet black hair, greasy from the sweat that covered his body the night before. His tongue danced around one of my nipples while his hand played with the other.

It certainly didn't take long for my blood to rush to another focus. He let out a moan as soon as my erection was pressing into him.

"What do you plan on doing with that?" He asked, running his index finger over my wet lips, down the quickest trail to my already throbbing shaft.

All I could do was moan in response. He wrapped his skilled fingers around my hardness, slicking me back with precum. I fought my eyes rolling back into my head, desperately wanting more of his branded torture.

"One day, I am going to tie you up...m-make you beg for mercy," He paused, only to bite down on my hip. "A riding crop, m-maybe? Black ropes around your wrists, your ankles? Hmm...teach you th-that you are not as vanilla as you appear."

I always had a feeling I would wind up in a situation like this. Mostly because what he was saying was right.

His words enticed me and caused a wild surge of confidence to flow through every fiber of my being. I wrapped my arms around him and switched our positions. He shrieked in delight, responding by wrapping his legs around me. I maneuvered myself above him, thrusting in without any further delay.

He was mine. 


	10. Step Up To The Line

Barbara was due home sometime in the afternoon. I was honestly dreading her return. After all of our time together, I had thought I was in love. I thought that she was the one that I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with. It was a shock when I found out that she wasn't. She never was. I had been more educated now. 

I only ever wanted to be with him, for the rest of my days. The two of us were meant for each other, despite our differences, it was only natural.

Now, I had to find a way to tell her without getting something valuable and likely heavy thrown at my head. I also had to actually go through with it, no backing out, because the faster it was over the sooner I would be able to spend the night in Oswald's arms.

Plus, there was no doubt that I wanted her to be able to move on as quickly as possible.

As I waited patiently for her to return I found myself packing a bag, all of my necessities, just in case. I knew how hot headed Barbara had been lately and I was not about to find myself trying to start completely from scratch.

It took a lot out of me to not call him, to not flee to him before she arrived. I was such a coward.

"Oh, Jim! I'm home!" Barbara shouted as she entered our clocktower apartment, dropping her bags down near the threshold.

I walked into the living room, displaying a nervous smile. It was a different feeling, looking into her eyes this time. She was beautiful, her eyes were beautiful, but there was a lack of kindness about her. She wasn't him. A part of me felt like she knew what I was about to say.

"Are you going to say something?" _Case in point._ She asked.

I blinked. For some reason I was having a hard time formulating any words at all. I simply just stared at her.

"Jim?"

I snapped out of it. "I'm so sorry, welcome home, Barbara!"

"Is something wrong, Jim?" She said, approaching me slowly.

"No, not at all,"

"For some reason, I do not believe you, maybe because I know you so well," _You think you know me so well, you mean?_

I couldn't help, but think that she had every right to be suspicious. I had been sleeping with a self proclaimed criminal mastermind behind her back for a while now.

"Well, I promise you that I will tell you if something is wrong, even if I can't give you all of the details." I told her, keeping my tone as even as I possibly could.

"In that case, I have something really wonderful to tell you, Jim," She said as her facial expression changed to something clearly more positive.

"Oh, really?"

She took my hands in hers. "Yeah, and you might want to sit down for this,"

"Okay," I muttered shakily, allowing her to lead me to the sofa.

She sat down beside me. She was absolutely beaming. I could not recall a moment in time where I had seen her so at ease and so lovely.

"So, Jim, I know that we haven't really talked much about the wedding and I know that this is going to seem crazy because we aren't exactly ready, but..." She stopped, taking both of my hands again.

"Go on,"

She placed one of my hands palm side up against her stomach. Before she said what I was beginning to fear she grabbed my wrist. There was a significant amount of black underneath my usually clean fingernails. Any dimwit analyst could figure out that the substance had definitely been picked up from Oswald's person. It could have been makeup, hair dye, nail polish or something more unusual. His mother was a strange woman and he had a strange job.

"Barbara?" I whispered.

She broke away from her daze and looked me in the eyes. "Jim, I'm pregnant,"

My heart sank. Even though I had been anticipating that this was what she was going to say, it didn't hurt until she said the words out loud. This made things more complicated. There was absolutely no clean break in this situation.

"Pregnant!" I shouted, trying my best to feign that I was happy about it, even though it was killing me.

"Yes, Jim, I'm pregnant,"

"That's fantastic!" I capped off my fake enthusiasm, entirely too worried that she would suddenly see through my mask.

"You are really happy about it, even with everything else that is going on?" She asked.

I nodded. "Of course I am,"

My phone started ringing and I almost thought it was out of convenience. I looked at it quickly, hitting the button to silence it. Oswald was going to be pissed, but there was not much I could do about it now.

"Do you need to get that?" She asked me.

"Nope,"

"Good, because I really wanted to celebrate," 

_Oh, fuck, are you serious?_ _Craaaap._

Barbara got up from her seat and walked into the bedroom. I was tempted to call Oswald in the short time that I had, but I managed to resist. Then I remembered a minor detail that was probably about to become very important, my packed travel bag was sitting right beside the bed. 

If she noticed the small luggage she was going to get curious and she would want to know why it was there and full in the first place. If she had taken it a step further there were at least two items that would cause her eyebrows to raise and venomous questions to be thrown. 

A few minutes later she popped her head out. "Umm...actually, I am not feeling so hot all of a sudden. I think I am just going to call it a night."

"That's too bad, but I understand hun. Harvey called a second time, anyways, they need me at the station." 

"Alright, Jim,"

I snuck out as soon as she shut the door. I needed to touch base with the love of my life before things got even more out of control. The bag could wait. 

***

Oswald was waiting for me in the park. His face lit up the second he saw me. His smile was so inviting that all I wanted to do was sink into him at that very moment, become one. However, I had to tell him about Barbara first.

It was awful that he looked so damn good and so damn happy. It was only going to make telling him that much harder.

He wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me into a passionate kiss. I couldn't resist the urge to touch him so I placed my hands firmly on his petite waist. This was heating up ridiculously fast. Already there was a change of blood flow targeting my arousal.

"I can't handle being away from you...you need to move...you...you should move in with me. Will you? Will you move in...with me?" Oswald said, barely containing his giggling.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," The words kept spilling from my lips. I needed to stop, needed to have a legitimate conversation with him, but all I could do was look at him and express my true feelings. 

"You should answer me,"

"I...I...Barbara is pregnant!" I shouted.

He gorgeous eyes enlarged. A combination of shock, fear, and disgust flooded into his expression, leaving him weakened. I watched him fall to his knees. He wasn't processing the information the way I had wanted him to. In reality, he was taking it the way I would have if the roles had been reversed.

I couldn't help him. I couldn't reach out to him. He had tears welling in his eyes. The love of my life's heart was breaking in front of me and it was my fault. 

He looked up at me for a moment. "How far along is she?" He asked in a whisper.

"What?"

"How far along is she!?" He repeated the words, raising his voice. 

"Uh...I am not sure, I think she just found out," 

"Interesting," He muttered as he rose back to his feet, refusing the help when I offered. 

"Why is that interesting?" I asked. 

"I...it...it is...interesting for one of two reasons, e-either you have been sleeping with her regularly enough for it to have happened, m...meaning that you lied to me about your sex life, telling me it had been a-a-long time, or, and you will not like this one, that baby she is carrying is...not yours."

I took his hands in mine. He tried to pull away, but I refused to loosen my grasp. "I am not fond of either of those, especially since I would never lie to you," I kissed his forehead. "I think that I have made my feelings rather clear, I do love you."

"Do me a favor then, Jim,"

"Absolutely, anything," I said almost too quickly, forgetting who Oswald was and what he was ABSOLUTELY capable of. He was, in fact, still a criminal. 

"I plan on disappearing for a few days, I-I-I will still be around, just not where you can find me. I have...important business matters to attend to. In that time, you...should make a break for it, leave Barbara. If you really feel the way you say you do, then I-I would love to see you sleeping in my bed when I return home." He explained. "Baby or no baby."

"She just told me she was pregnant, that would be a horrible thing for me to do,"

"I said, baby or no baby. The baby is most likely not even yours, the chances seem to slim, and if I am wrong...so be it. You belong in my bed. I want to be the one who takes care of you-you...after a long night of fighting crime that may have been caused by me. I want you to come home to me and let me blow your mind."

"Os..." He cut me off.

"No, you do not get to put stipulations or conditions or what ifs into this scenario. Either you come home to me, or, or you don't. I love you, sometimes more than I-I am willing to admit. I know what happens to kids that are the product of loveless environments, they wind up messed up, and if that baby is yours...staying together for...for a baby is ridiculous because of the long term damage, the f-fighting alone. He or she will be better of seeing their father happy, even if happy is some new concept entirely."

"I don't think I tell you enough just how amazing you are,"

I wrapped my arms back around his petite waist, pulling him in close. Our lips met, sealing this new chapter in our lives together better than any words ever could. 

"Thank you," He whispered when I let him go.

I could hear sirens in the distance. There were plenty of them, squad cars blaring in two sets of unison as a form of distress and warning.

Not even a minute after I heard the sirens I received a call from dispatch. The information was given was unsettling.

I put my phone back in my pocket, turning full attention to Oswald once more. He knew exactly what was going on in Gotham. He was a puppet master in the crime world.

"I know that you do not want me to completely solve this, but you really do have to tell me what the hell is going on," I said with a stern tone. "You have to throw me a bone with this one, babe, I can't let this go without punishment."

He smiled a bit wickedly. "Go in the opposite direction of the sirens. The sirens are heading towards a distraction, not the actual crime. There is about to be a mass robbing of banks, perhaps you can beat them to one of the locations?"

"Got an address for me?"

"Of course I do, anything for you,"


	11. Where The Ghost Is Your Best Friend

"I truly, completely cannot believe that you did this to me," I said out loud. There was no one around to hear me, but I was still pretty damn pissed off and felt I had the right to express it.

I was trying to be optimistic. I was giving Oswald the benefit of the doubt. I wanted this to be legitimate and not just some part of a wild goose chase.

I called Harvey for backup, not really knowing what I was actually getting myself into. He was on the other side of the city so it was taking him much longer to get to my location than normal, it was making me anxious. 

He thought I was out of my mind when I quickly explained that I had received a tip from an unknown source. Maybe it was a good thing that he was so far away since this entire thing was turning into a bust.

Either way, when he did finally arrive, I was going to be asked enough questions to start a police report. We were in an okay place, but there was always room for intrusion. At least, after the last morally right thing I chose to do. 

That made me realize just how happy I was that I didn't go through with the murder plot. Oswald was much to important to me.

"Fuck..." I groaned.

"Where is the party at, JIm? You called me away from the twenty car chase and the arson of condemned, abandoned buildings." Harvey asked as he approached me. I could hear him smother a laugh, thinking I was an idiot.

"I...I do not know, I honestly have no idea," I replied, hanging my head in shame and disappointment.

Just then, by the cue of me losing faith in my boyfriend's words, a car pulled up in front of the bank. Four well dressed thugs that could have easily been members of a rival gang emerged. They continued forward, seeming completely unphased by me or by Harvey. 

"Stop! G.C.P.D!" Harvey shouted, whipping his gun out with ease.

They still barely granted us a slight reaction. The driver of the vehicle walked up to me, scanning my face for information I wasn't able to determine. He took a step back, taking in a full detailed image of the entire length of my body. This was confusing.

"Are you The Penguin's man?" He asked.

"Um, I think so?"

"I believe it is a yes or a no question and we will not proceed without a proper answer," The man told me.

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, I am his man,"

"Thank you, sir," The man said as he turned around with his arms behind his back. "You may now take me in, there is fifty thousand dollars in the trunk of the vehicle I am giving to you. However, my accomplices will get away unharmed and with no vivid descriptions. Is that understood?" 

I nodded, though in reality I was still a bit unsure about what was going on and it was only getting worse. 

"Thank you again, sir," The man said.

Just like that I was able to arrest the man. I called for backup to retrieve the money and the vehicle. It was made to seem like a huge deal that I had pulled any member of the police force away from a fire that could have easily been handled by the firefighters.

***

Back at the station Harvey was on me like white on rice, following me literally everywhere. He kept hinting at the fact that he wanted to say something to me, but he never did.

"Would you stop it?" I asked, hating how tense it was getting with him practically breathing down my neck. 

"I just...I just...Jim!" 

"What!?"

"Are you...are you sleeping with Penguin?" He asked nervously, avoiding making eye contact with me.

I did my best to keep my expression the same. I didn't want to react too much or too little. The last time that I offered him up any information it managed to get around to the entire precinct. I was not prepared for that to happen again. "I have a fiancee, Harvey, don't ask such silly questions,"

He raised his eyebrows at me. "Last I checked things with you and Barbara were on the rocks and there was a new man in your life, you told me there was a man in your life, you can't act like those words did not come straight from your mouth,"

"Last time I told you anything, you told everyone, why would I trust you with any sensitive information?"

"I didn't tell anyone, I guarantee someone overheard us,"

"If that made sense, then I would not have answered you silently,"

Harvey shrugged. "i'm telling the truth!"

I sat down and took a deep breath. "Okay, okay, listen,"

"I am all ears,"

I quickly looked around to ensure that there was no one around who could hear or see us. "I am. Constantly. I love to. I love him. And, Barbara is pregnant."

"That puts a damper on things, doesn't it?" He asked, which was what I had been thinking. The paternity of the child was still not certain, no matter what Oswald said.

"In a sense. Except that he still wants to be with me. He loves me. It is unconditional." I continued to speak in minorly broken sentences so that potential eavesdroppers would have a harder time putting the pieces together.

"I don't get it..." Harvey trailed off, scuffing his right foot against the ground.

"You do not get what, exactly?" I asked him, wide eyed.  _I am allowed to stop blinking during conversations like this._

"The connection,"

I sighed. "He's lovely. Beautiful. Soulful. His eyes."

"Okay, that's enough, I'll accept it as if I didn't hear it. I have reports to finalize, anyways."

I leaned my head back and began to laugh. The words we spoke were so simple, but they opened my world up in one thousand ways. I always dreamed of settling down and having children and from what I could tell I was half way there. Plus, I knew just how to get the other half. 

Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot, till death do us part. I want to wake up every morning to his smile, go to sleep in his embrace, laugh and cry with him. I was in love with him. I couldn't deny it, even if I wanted to. He was my light and my darkness. 

There was only one thing I could do. 

I was going to. 

My palms were sweating, clammy all of a sudden with a mix of anticipation and nervousness. 

My phone rang. It was just the man I wanted to speak with. "Hello, Oswald? When can I see you? I need to talk to you right away. It is important."

_**' Is something wrong?'** _

"No, nothing at all, just meet me somewhere, anywhere, you pick a place, I don't care,"

_**'You are kind of scaring me, Jim,'** _

"Don't worry, babe, just do what I want and you will understand."

_**'Fine, how about...h-how about that mexican place? Thirty minutes?'** _

"Perfect. That works. Thank you. I love you. Bye!"

I jumped up from my seat and ran for the door. It was now or never. In no time at all I had agreed to break up with Barbara, move into his home, and now this. I was crazy.


	12. This Is Where It Becomes Something Real

I was pacing. Back and forth.  _Back and forth._ **Back and forth.** To the point that I was driving myself crazy. I was going to kill myself by waiting. 

As I moved back and forth and back and forth, I continuously looked up, hoping I would see his face. Not even his face, just a part of him. 

It had been thirty five minutes. I was beginning to feel restless. Not to mention that I was worried. This was a strange kind of worry, especially since I couldn't place a legitimate reason to be that way.

"Jim," He said my name like with this sweetness that was hard to avoid. "What are you doing?"

I turned in his direction, smiling as I realized how ridiculous I must have looked, and that was especially the case based on the distance he was standing from me. Normal men, especially the detective kind, did not usually pace awkwardly in front of Mexican restaurants. If they did, there would be weirdoes positioned at every corner.

He had his sassy hands on his hips. The clarity of his eyes bright, even in the darkness. His eyes were loving. 

It was then that I forgot how to speak, unable to respond as he captivated me with only five words, one of which was my name, and soft, pale skin. 

"Jim?" He said again, head cocked slightly to the side. 

I snapped out of my daze, hard. It was like falling down to earth and hitting the pavement, but in the most incredible and endearing way. "Oswald,"

"What are you doing? More specifically, why are you pacing like that?" He asked, moving a bit closer. There was a small hint of fear in his body language, probably wondering if I might still turn on him due to my job or my maybe child. 

"Because I couldn't wait to see you, I was anxious, you make me come undone," The words fell from my lips, but they didn't even begin to fully explain just how I felt. It was going to be a battle to see if it was even possible for me to say those words. 

He smiled. That smile of his was an entirely new level for me. It was the look that was best on him, the look that made me fall in love a little more each time. 

"Wow," He mumbled, hand now resting over his heart. 

I bridged the gap between us, my arms around his waist. I loved him more than I ever would have thought. And, when I looked into his eyes, I didn't see him, I saw the future. It, the future, looked pretty bright from my view.

"I think I want to marry you, Oswald," I blurted out in the least romantic way possible, because that was who I was at the heart of things.

He raised his eyebrows. "You think you want to marry me? What am I supposed to do with that information?" 

"I think you are supposed to realize what I am saying,"

"I do, you said that you think you want to marry me, which I-I take to mean you...are not one hundred percent sure,"

I let him go, allowing to balance himself back on the gorgeous cane he brought with him. Leadership certainly looked good on him. He was beautiful in the moonlight, everything reflecting off of his skin and the shimmer of the suit he wore.

I figured there was only one way to do this and that was the traditional way. I took a deep breath, feeling like a complete moron for even letting it go this far without proper planning, then I lowered myself onto one knee. If police saw, who cared? If the criminal underground saw, who cared? 

"Oswald, baby," I started off again, a million ways to say it flushing in my mind and taking me for a ride. If I was being honest, it was making my head swim, almost painful with desires. 

"Jim, get off your knee right now," Oswald demanded, but his voice faltered. 

I ignored him, instead positioning myself even closer. I took his hands in mine, staring into his eyes to keep him locked in place. "I am not going to do that,"

"Jim," He whined, this time being the one looking around to see the citizens of Gotham watching them on the sidewalk. 

"Oswald Cobblepot, I know our time together has been short in comparison to others, and I know that I don't have a ring, but I know what I want. I want you and only you. Our lives were destined to be intertwined from the moment that I let you live. We've become the stuff of fairytales. You make me whole and I didn't even know that was possible. Everything that you are, everything that you are becoming, just the right catalyst to make me see the real me. Of all the reckless things that I have done in my life, I need one thing that is completely right. I love you, Oswald."

"Jim..." His tone became more of a whimper as he desperately tried to hide the tears that were very obviously welling up in his eyes. 

"I can't promise that this won't be difficult, circumstance has brought us here and circumstance is nowhere near perfect, in fact, it is the exact opposite. We stand on different sides of the law and I accept that. I can promise, however, that I will love you and cherish you and make you understand your true worth everyday for the rest of my life. I will stand by you in the darkness, in the light as well." I continued, amazed that I was not a blubbery mess.

"This is not happening, I refuse to believe this is happening, stop it..." He wiped a stray tear that had created a shiny trail down one of his cheeks. 

"It is happening, believe it," I said, taking a deep breath that I absolutely needed. "Will you marry me?"

He closed his eyes tightly as he nodded positively, allowing himself to actually cry. "I can't...I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else. Of course, I will."

"Really?" 

"Yes," 

I stood back up into a standing position. I wrapped my arms back around Oswald, needing to hold him in my arms as much as I needed to remember to breathe. He leaned into me, his head pressed against my chest as he slowly became less emotional. I rubbed my hands up and down his back, finally moving into his hair. I inhaled, taking in his scent, settling on the fact that I wanted to stay like this forever. 

I lifted his head off of me for a moment, my hand underneath his chin. Suddenly, he looked shy and embarrassed, not wanting me to see the man he was when in my presence. "You really have no idea, do you?" 

He managed a quick, "Hm?", in response. 

"You are so damn beautiful," I whispered before pulling him into a kiss. 

When the kiss broke, he interlocked our fingers, walking in the direction of my car. 

"Follow me," He half whispered.

"Don't you want to get some food? Celebrate?" I asked.

"We are going to go celebrate...in-in my bedroom," He replied, seductiveness in full effect. 

"What?" I shot out of my mouth before his words could really sink in. "Oh. Oh!"

***

The blur of the night had me trying to figure out how come I had such a headache. I was even more concerned with the position I woke up in. There was just something a little odd about knowing which way you got into a bed, only to wake up at the other end almost diagonally. 

The bed was a mess. The linens that were not crowded and twisted around my frame were pulled straight off the mattress. Not a single pillow, save for the throw directly underneath my left calf, remained on the bed. It was almost too destroyed to fix.

My legs were murderously sore to top things off. 

I glanced around the room for signs of Oswald. I wanted to know that he was still around and had not left me with by myself with his mother. It had been odd enough knowing that we had weird, kinky sex in the same house as her. 

I managed to pull myself off of the bed, gathering the clothes I could actually find and that did not include my boxers. I dressed myself, sans tie as well, and proceeded to leave the room, knowing full well what kind of conversations might arise. 

My hair looked ridiculous. 

"Are you trying to escape without me noticing?" The voice of the man I loved asked as his bare arms wrapped around me. 

I turned my head to see him, toothbrush sticking out of his mouth, smiling. He nuzzled into me a bit, blow dried hair still holding warmth as it touched my neck. 

"I actually figured you left," I admitted.

"I was supposed to, but I couldn't bring myself to," He chuckled. "By the time I woke up...it-it was going to be too late, anyways, because I needed a shower. Can't run a group of criminals smelling like sweat and semen."

"I see," I said quietly. 

He spun me around to face him. The sight in front of me was enough to make my jaw drop. Only in a towel, freshly showered, he seemed different. I couldn't place a finger on it, a new unspoken radiance, glowing in his eyes and spilling from the pores of his skin. He looked softer, even, less of a hard edge in his persona. That was not to say that it wasn't there, it just appeared to be tamed, possibly only temporarily. 

"I knew that I needed to be here when you woke up, so I could do this..." Oswald's arms went up around my neck as he leaned in to kiss me. 

The lusty liplock lead me to grab onto his ass through the terrycloth, using my strength to press him against me. The quickest way to get a potentially awkward hard on. 

He pulled away right before things got too heated, but I could see in his eyes, the damage was done. 

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you, too," He whispered back. "Why are we whispering?"

I shook my head. "Because of your mother,"

"I don't understand,"

"She was asleep before we came in, she doesn't know that I am here,"

"That is nonsense, Jim, why would that even matter? I am an adult and I can have visitors whenever I want. It is not like a teenager and an older man sneaking around."

"Well, then let's tell her the good news,"


	13. All That I Am Is Because Of You

We approached the kitchen, holding hands. Oswald had since put on clothing, so it was a little less awkward. 

Oswald's mother lit up upon us entering. She ushered for us to sit down before either of us were able to say anything. She handed us each a cup of tea, joining us in the third chair. She had the biggest smile still adorning her face. 

I couldn't even begin to imagine what was going to happen to her once we filled her in. She was already brimming with excitement just from our presence. 

She sipped her tea. "You two have a good night?"

I swallowed hard. "Hm?"

"Well, I could hear Oswald's headboard hitting the wall, so I figured you two boys must have had a good night," She was still smiling. 

_So much for this not being awkward._

Oswald reached over and took my hand, giving it a light squeeze. His tantalizing eyes glued on mine. "We had a wonderful night, but that was not why,"

"What are you talking about, Oswald?" Gertrud asked.

"He has asked me to marry him, mother, and I said yes," Oswald explained.

The smile that took over his lovely face made me want to kiss him. He was the love of my life and because of that I wanted to keep that smile on his face forever.

"WHAT!? WHAT!?" She screamed, but it wasn't clear if the emotions being conveyed were happy or angry as a demon.

"I'm going to marry Jim, I love him," 

I scooted my chair over enough so that I could rest my head on his shoulder. He was so magnificent this way. 

Gertrud looked me in the eyes with a strange intensity. Then she squinted, honing in on me. "Do you love my son, Detective?"

I nodded. "Your son is the only one that I want and I promise to love him until I am six feet under ground,"

Her expression was blank, leaving me to question everything she ever said in the past. I even had to wonder if she only wanted me to be the one who broke her son out of his shell, not the one whom he shared his new life with. It made enough sense. I was a Detective and I was slightly older and I was, of course, engaged still to Barbara. 

_Fucking hell with all fuckery, I am engaged to two people. One of whom might be carrying my child, the other who might be carrying Gotham's underground._

"Do you plan to support him? You are going to take care of him, regardless of that job of yours?" She asked me.

Here I was, nodding again. "I could not think of doing anything else,"

"I am going to marry him, no matter what you say, don't you dare scare him off," Oswald said in this whiny tone.

I kissed his cheek. "I am not going anywhere, no matter what, no one is going to scare me away," 

Oswald's mother got up from her chair and walked around behind the two of us. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, placing a wet kiss on the side of my face. "I could not be happier for the two of you! I cannot wait for you to be married! I better get grandbabies."

Oswald rolled his eyes, but if things leaned in my favor then there was a possibility of me making her wish come true. I definitely could see us starting a family now, the future was bright and clear, despite the dark undertones of the city.

Oswald turned his head towards me, biting his bottom lip. His smile was all in his eyes. My love was all in mine. A new chapter, a new hope.  _And, oh my god, I was forgetting about Barbara again! I never even called, or went home, or...fuck!_

I gulped pretty loudly, attracting enough attention from both of them. 

"What's wrong, Jim?" Oswald asked, rubbing my arm.

"I have to go back to my apartment," I muttered. 

His eyes grew wide. "Right now?"

"Yes, yes, but you should come with me,"

"Isn't...is...you're sure?" 

"Yes, I am sure. Please come with me. It is important for you to be there, you are my fiance." The last word felt like it came from a different world, felt so strange leaving my lips. I had said it before, but never to him and never in reference to him. It felt amazing.

"Telling other people the good news?" Gertrud asked, positively bubbly. 

"Uh...sort of,"

***

This felt like hell. I was certain that there was heat rising in the apartment building. Hell knew that I was coming in to feed that fire with every piece of my soul. 

The neighbors were going to talk. I was going to let them. I walked right up to the door holding Oswald's hand. He was my family now. I had to make sure that he knew it. 

And, despite what was about to happen, I kept thinking about what kind of ring I was going to purchase for him. 

I unlocked the door and entered, leaving Oswald to wait right outside. I promised to call him in when the moment was right, but now it certainly wasn't. I hated leaving him, soft and welcoming. So incredibly beautiful. I had to get this over with, however.

Barbara was sitting in her favorite chair, cup of hot chocolate in one hand, remote in the other.  _Wearing one of my best shirts._

"JIM! You're home! I kept calling and calling, I called the station...you were suspended? Anyways, they said you were there last night, but left. Where have you been?"

I made eye contact with her, knowing full well that she was going to be able to see right through me if I didn't. I took a deep breath. Dying had to be easier than this. 

"I did not come home, because..." I steadied my breathing. "...I stayed the night with a friend of mine."

"A female friend?" She inquired.

"No, a he," I informed her. "But it got me to thinking..."

"Thinking about what, Jim? I don't like your tone and my hormones are going crazy, so, you better tell me quick."

"Before you start hurling heavy objects at me, or going into the kitchen with a knife, understand that this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to tell anyone, mostly because it was hard enough to admit to myself. I can't live a lie. I don't want to. I want to be a good father, a good friend, and a good husband..." 

She stood up, moving slowly towards me, allowing me to get a better look at how hot the liquid in the mug was. "Why on earth would that make me want to hurt you? What you are saying is beautiful."

I closed my eyes. I chewed on my bottom lip for a second, hunting for the words to make this mental stab just a tiny bit better. 

"Barbara, the reason that you are going to try to kill me, is because I do not want to be your husband," I sighed.

She dropped the hot chocolate, glass shattering as it hit the ground, splashing the burning liquid on her feet and legs and my pants. She shrieked, momentarily blinded by the accidental mess, but when she regained her composure, she had demonic fire in her eyes. 

"So, you were cheating on me?" She asked, almost sounding like a growl.

"Yes, technically, I was cheating on you and I regret what I did simply because I knew it would hurt when you found out. However, our relationship had been painful to be a part of by the time I thought of establishing another. I didn't fall in love with him on purpose, I didn't even know I could have those feelings for a man." I explained. 

"A man? A fucking man? You are leaving me, the mother of your unborn fucking child to be with some...oh! You fucking asshole! Peter! He isn't your colleague, he is your god damn boyfriend!" She shouted, my shirt collar twisted up in her hands. "Where is that little prick, anyways!? I'll fucking gut him! No one makes a move on my man! Dirty little manslut!"

"Barbara...Barb...this can't be good for the baby," I reminded her, hoping she would not go on a murderous rampage.

"You motherfucking asshole, telling me what is good and not good for the baby you obviously don't give a damn about!" She raised her shout to a scream. 

"Don't you dare act like I do not care about MY child!" I was now at a shouting tone. 

She began crying hysterically, flailing about like a madwoman. I backed up over the shards of broken glass wanting to find solace in escaping out the door. I didn't. Oswald opened the door and entered, hearing the nonsense from the other side. 

As soon as she laid eyes on him she stopped. She became intensely quiet, head cocked to the side with malicious intent. I was worried she was actually going to try to kill him. 

"You little bitch!" She moved in on him quickly, bridging what little space kept them apart. As soon as she reached him, her hands were around his neck, threatening to keep me from having my happy ending by taking his life. 

He didn't fight her off. Not even one attempt was made to stop her from killing him. Instead, he laughed. 

"Why are you fucking laughing, bitch?!" She screamed at him.

"Because I am crazy, but I'm not nearly as...crazy as you," He continued his laughing. 

I grabbed Barbara by the waist as soon as I deemed it safe and was actually able to process complex thoughts, pulling her back and forcing her to let go. This was not going to end the way she wanted it to. 

"You're both assholes! What kind of men do this to a pregnant woman!?"

I subdued her, taking her arms behind her back. I yanked her wrists down, tying them together with my tie. I forced her to sit down, which for some reason she didn't try to stop.

"Barbara, this is Oswald Cobblepot, my fiance. I love him." I said in the calmest tone I could muster. "I am going to untie you and leave, but I will return for the rest of my stuff, for now you can be alone. You can try to figure out why this has happened, but even then you won't find an answer."

She nodded. So, I untied her. She proved that I was less intelligent by picking up a piece of broken glass and coming after me. 

Oswald grabbed a hold of my arm and pulled me out of the apartment, but not before she sliced into my cheek. 

That was going to leave a mark.


	14. The Choices We Make, Reflect Our Fates

The side of my face was bleeding a lot more heavily than I anticipated. The cut was deep and because of that fact, Oswald stopped me as soon as we were out of the building to examine it for any fibers that may have stayed behind.

"We need to get you stitched," Oswald mumbled, his hands holding my head in place. "I...I know somewhere we can go,"

"Why not a hospital or an urgent care office?" I asked, which felt strange, moving my jaw and all. 

"Why? Because at best this is going to scar, at worst it is going to cause...tightening in...your cheek...I-I am going to have bruising along my neck. It would look bad, the two of us. Domestic or criminal versus the law." Oswald explained, which of course he was one hundred percent right.

I sighed, placing my hand against the wound. "Yep, yep, you are right, let's go where you wanted,"

***

We finally arrived at a shady, underground establishment that was a hybrid between a nightclub and a library. It would have been an interesting place, had I known it existed, it had not been ran by criminals, or I had not been losing unfortunate amounts of blood from the side of my face.

Oswald dragged me into a room in the very back where a gorgeous blond woman was sitting. She cocked her head to the side upon seeing me. Somewhere near deranged and amused, she pulled out a needle and what looked like surgical type thread. She handed them to Oswald before sitting down in her chair. This was almost terrifying.

"What did you two do? Crazy sex?" She asked, after all of the awkward silence.

Her voice was weirdly annoying.

Oswald gestured for me to sit in one of the empty chairs. He pulled another closer and sat beside me. My shaky, adorable fiance suddenly had the skilled hands of a surgeon.

"Did you hear me Penguin?" She began to speak again, because the night could not have been any worse. "How did you get those injuries? Those from sex?"

Oswald blushed. "No, but what I would not mind during such an act is the choking..." He said, more to me than the woman.

"Then what happened?" I could not explain her voice. For such a young, lovely woman she had the strangest pitch and it made my ears ring.

"We were attacked by an angry vessel," Oswald scoffed.

I tried not to laugh, mostly because he was sewing my cheek up.

"Your neck is getting real purple," She said, pointing at him.

He nodded. "I...figured as much,"

She finally stopped talking. I was so happy I wanted to find a religious building and pray to whatever deity it followed. I only wanted to hear his voice. That was it. I had had enough of listening to psycho blonds.

As soon as he finished stitching up the gash on my face we left. He held my hand as we walked up the stairs and onto the street. Barbara really did do a number to his neck, which made me remember the comment that he made in the room.

"Did you really mean what you said back there?" I asked, which really, really felt weird now that I was rocking thread in my cheek.

He raised an eyebrow. "That I enjoy...b-being choked during sex?"

"That, yes," I said, shaky.

"I do," His voice was noticeably more hoarse than it had been before his skin showed off a deep colored bruise.

"Oh," I said under my breath.

He smiled up at me and leaned his head against my shoulder. "My sweet, innocent, Mr. Vanilla, you have so much to learn,"

I wrapped an arm around him. "And here I thought your kink had something to do with tying me up?"

"It does, but...s-s-ome-times I want to be tied up...and...I want hands around my throat,"

I couldn't not shake my head at him. "You are so wonderfully weird,"

***

My suspension was fully revoked after it was discovered that my actions, however set up by Oswald they were, had done more for the precinct then any of the nonsense that involved fires in abandoned buildings. Go figure.

Harvey was really interested in having a full conversation with me, despite that I was supposed to be confined to my desk. To make matters more interesting, he was arguing to get me out in the field to meet new ladydoc at Arkham. Intention may or may not have been skewed, but I digress.

I was stuck on wondering what Oswald was doing all day. I was stuck on wondering what _my fiance_ was doing all day. I felt like we needed to spend more time together considering all that had transpired.

However, somehow, charming misfit Harvey Bullock had it approved.

I was going to meet this woman and examine the crime scene at the forsaken mental hospital.

"I have a question," I was sick of having to ask people questions.

"Shoot, man," Harvey replied as we walked up to the main entrance of the main building.

"WHY!?" I shouted, emotionally disturbed or something.

"What are you talking about?"

"Why do you want me to meet Dr. Thompkins?"

"It wasn't so much that I wanted you to meet her, specifically, I just found out that she was the new doctor here, I got a good look at her, you could use some action based on the look of you. By the way, what the hell happened to your face?"

"Barbara cut my face, but that is beside the point. I do not need any action, I get plenty on my own. I have someone. We've discussed this. I don't want to date Dr. Thompkins."

_And, because I was speaking and am a general awkward human being, there is the hot lady doctor hearing exactly what I just said._

"Hello," She said with a wave. "I'm Dr. Leslie Thompkins, you can call me Lee, and I don't want to date you either."

My face was hot with embarrassment. I nervously scratched the back of my head. My hands were instantly clammy. I needed to hold onto something. The one time I would have loved to bring Oswald to a crime scene. "I am sooooo sorry, you were not supposed to hear that,"

She laughed, placing her hand lightly over her chest. "It is completely okay, I actually find it really funny,"

"Good, because I don't. My name is Jim Gordon, for the record. Detective." I said, holding out my hand.

Lee had a confident, strong handshake. My initial thought was that she might be more like me in the orientation category, or she was just that strong and that amazing. Either way, I was still red as a lobster.

"Jim, I love that name. If you don't mind my asking, what happened to your cheek?"

"Glass and crazy ex happened, apparently crazy ex's don't like to be broken up with and then told that you are going to marry someone else,"  _Why on earth was I telling her this?_

"Well, at least the stitches are good, surgical perfection, that sounds weird...I'm sorry, please, Detectives, come in and do your jobs that I am preventing you from doing."

She followed. Curiosity, perhaps. Regardless, she was good company. Good conversations. I was actually looking forward to having a good friend. If she would take me, that is. 

"So, who is he?" She whispered. 

My jaw dropped. "Um, what?"

"Your boyfriend, he's in law enforcement?"

"How do you know that I have a boyfriend?" I asked.

"I wasn't sure, but you just confirmed it," She said with a smirk.

I smiled back. "Opposite side of the law, actually," 

"I'm sure that leaves you conflicted,"

"Not as much as you would think,"

It was the stranger mentality. She didn't know me. I didn't know her. Neither of us could judge the other. I felt as if I could say anything to her. 

Deities such as God knew I needed someone to talk to about my life. And, since Harvey decided to block everything I said out...

***

I really hate getting ambushed.

More so if the person who decides to do it, incapacitates me to the point that I can't even speak. 

However, if someone was going to ambush me, they might as well be taking me to Oswald, otherwise I was going to have a fit.

I was ambushed. Hopeful, still.

Especially, after the strange day I had had. 

Instinctively, I knew I was safe, but I was going to be in for a bumpy ride.


	15. Can't Help It

I was yanked out of a car, gag removed from my mouth. I only had my hearing and my sense of smell to help me discern the location that I had been brought to. 

The sunlight beamed down on my face. It felt warm despite the chill in the air. It was nice. The air smelled of strong fall floral scents, mixed gently with wonderful call of fallen leaves. To be honest, before now, the changing of the seasons had gone over my head, but I was willing to accept it as truth now. 

I could hear faint voices in the background. I heard breathing of my captor, almost familiar and male. If I had to make a guess at least one of the people in my presence was Butch. It had been a while. 

A unique pattern of footsteps approached. I knew them like the back of my hand. I wouldn't have to guess. Those steps were Oswald's. 

Something sweet was pressed up against my lips. The smell infiltrated my nose and caused me to salivate. 

"Bite down," Oswald whispered, closer than I thought. 

I parted my lips slightly, allowing Oswald to push what I determined was a slice of apple into my mouth. I took a bite, flavor inhabiting my tongue in waves. The apple was incredibly fresh. I was starting to get the feeling that we were not in Gotham anymore. 

"Might I be able to see you? Not that I mind being fed honeycrisps, but I want to see your beautiful face." I said, voice hitting an almost sing-song quality. 

"Hmm, my dear Jim," He spoke directly into my mouth, lips brushing against mine. 

"Please, Oswald?" I begged.

"Of course, I can't deny you," Oswald slid behind me, pulling at the knot that held my blindfold on my head. It dropped off of my face, revealing more than just the beauty I was expecting.

We were standing in the small orchard of a Victorian style bed and breakfast. It was a relief that we were not anywhere near the madness of the city. This was perfect. 

"Oh my," I turned around, facing Oswald. I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him against me. I could have held him in an embrace forever.

"I take it that you like it?" He asked, long eyelashes fluttering over his eyes flirtatiously. 

"I love it," I whispered, kissing his pale cheek. "There is just one thing that is bothering me..."

"What is that?" Oswald asked.

"I feel like we have chaperones," I replied, gesturing over at the men positioned in rather obvious places across the expansive property. 

Oswald sighed. "I know, I know, they were insisted upon me because I have been moving up the ranks. I could tell them to back down, if you wanted, but they are probably still going to be close by."

I grabbed his ass, pressing the bones of his pelvis hard into mine. "I think that they should back down, at least a little, it isn't like we are in Gotham," 

Oswald moaned. "Yes, yes,"

"Tell them I don't mean to be rude," I kissed him softly. "But I'm about to get really affectionate with you, and I'm probably going to start getting really handsy, and I'm not looking for an audience,"

Oswald swallowed. He bit his bottom lip blood red. That was a good way to get me hot and bothered, if I hadn't been heading in that general direction already. 

Oswald separated from my embrace. He wandered over to where Butch was standing. He quickly whispered something to him, pointing at me and smiling. Butch nodded and waved his people down. 

He returned to me, pupils blown, pulling me into a kiss. His aftershave and the apples on the trees surrounding us swirled around making me dizzy. I had to have him. 

***

My beloved lead me to our room, large enough to take up a majority of the top floor of the building, minus the large bathroom. A master suite, of sorts. He pushed me down onto the bed, crawling on top, legs squeezing around my hips. 

He caught me by the mouth as he began to grind down with his wonderful hips, friction waking my erection in my trousers. I groaned, hands finding leverage on his shoulders while I rocked up into him.

I slid his jacket off, quickly unbuttoning his silk shirt and tie, throwing it to the side. I ran my hands along the creamy white skin of his torso, his nipples getting equal attention as I sat up, finding good enough reason to incorporate my mouth.

Sooner than anticipated, we were completely naked. Oswald moved down my body, taking the entire length of my shaft into his mouth. He hollowed his cheeks, lips wrapped tightly around while he sucked, head bobbing up and down with impossibly perfect rhythm. 

I grabbed him by the hair, pulling him off of my cock. I whipped him around, pushing his face down into the pillows. I moved swiftly, spreading his legs apart, running my hands along his sinewy thighs. I lowered myself, pressing my lips against the most sensitive parts of his, tongue delving deep until he was moaning beneath me. I held him steady, eating him with fiery passion and desire. 

"James! Jim!" Oswald cried out, again and again. "James!" He panted, breaking into a sweat. I reached up as he threw his head back and threaded my fingers in his jet black hair. 

I replaced my tongue with two of my fingers, stretching him and taking great measure to punish his prostate. His whole body jerked beneath me. I kissed my way up his spine, wanting nothing more than to make him say my name, loving the way it sounded coming from his mouth. 

He rolled over, out of my grasp. I caught him by the back of his knee, dragging him back towards me. I shoved him down on his back, immediately thrusting my cock inside of him. 

A long collection of pleasurable moans flowed between us as I penetrated deeply into his tight hole while stroking his near perfect shaft in my hand. He brought me low, pulling me into drawn out kisses, bites that left us swollen in the lips.

"Fuck," I mumbled, the sound escaping me without warning. 

Oswald grabbed both of my hands and placed them around his neck. Even with his bruising, he assured me with simple touches that he wanted me to do it. I picked up my rhythm, pistoning my hips to further envelop myself with him. I put pressure on his neck, choking him lightly.

I found that the sounds pushed me further. If he stopped, I would press harder, would thrust harder. The headboard of the bed smacked against the wall violently, only matched in volume by our shouts of pleasure.

We came together, his cum coating his belly as mine filled him inside. 

My arms gave out and I collapsed onto Oswald who was still beneath me, body finally still as he stopped writhing from aftershocks of orgasm. 

I finally found the strength to pull out and roll to the side. My breathing finally steady. 

Oswald leaned up on his elbow, watching me, tracing a finger across my chest. "That..."

"That?"

"You...James Fucking Gordon..."

I chuckled lightly. "I...cannot believe how good you feel..."

"Well, I imagined that is part of the reason that you wanted to marry me,"

I grabbed him by the nape of his neck, pulling him into a quick kiss. "I want to marry you because I am in love with you, not because you are a great fuck,"

He smiled. "We should probably head back into Gotham, your colleagues will be missing you,"

I groaned. "I guess you're right,"

I didn't even want to know how many missed calls I was going to have. I lost my phone in transport.


	16. All That Is Seen To Be Seen

Oswald was an elegant eccentric, one with a taste for the finer, and the more odd, things in life. I accepted that. I loved that. It was part of what drew me to fall in love with him. His unique perspectives and sights made him all the better.

Then again, he might have really been the freak everyone claimed him to be, and I was simply blinded by my love. I accepted that possibility, as well.

It was no question that he would do most of the wedding planning. He was my beautiful bride for all intent and purpose. Being part of the criminal ranks left him with a bit more money at his disposal than I ever would have had, so, of course I was willing to allow him to organize whatever he wanted. The only thing I was required to do was pick out a tux and show up at the location on the proper date, at the proper time. Simple enough.

On top of this wedding, I did have one other thing to deal with. Barbara's pregnancy. We were not on speaking terms, still, but I made sure to attend every single doctor's appointment that she had. The doctor did find it a bit off that I never spoke to the woman who was definitely carrying my child, as soon as it was okay we had tested the paternity, but no one ever mentioned it.

All that I cared about was the health of the child, anything involving Barbara was becoming a footnote in my life.

Today, Oswald joined me to the appointment. And, since Barbara was refusing to speak in general as much as I was refusing to speak to her, she didn't deny him entrance into the room. The doctor didn't question it, either.

I held his hand, salt in the wound. He nuzzled against my chest, watching her as he did so. Her eyes like daggers in response. 

A part of me figured that part of the reason that she wasn't going on the defensive was because I still had the scars to prove she assaulted me last time. Oswald was an eyewitness account to it. 

She just grumbled while the doctor set up fro the ultrasound, something terrible under her breath that much I was sure. 

"Is this your boyfriend, Mr. Gordon?" The doctor had decided she was allowed to make small talk with me since this was the first time another human had been in the room. It was her first chance to make it slightly less uncomfortable. 

Only because the doctor didn't really know anything about the beautiful man I held in my arms, I answered accurately. "Actually, this is my fiance, Oswald,"

"Oh, I see," She replied.

Just like that the conversation was over. 

***

"You are a piece of shit, do you know that? A real piece of shit!" Barbara shouted, getting so close to Oswald that she probably could have opened her mouth and bit his nose.

I was a few feet ahead of them. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned towards the two of them. "Hey!"

"Stay out of it, Jim," Oswald called back. "I can handle her."

"I really don't think you can," Barbara groaned. 

"If you weren't pregnant with my future husband's child, I would gut you where you stand," Oswald's voice was wicked, almost slurred with ill intent. "But, despite that I truly hate you, I could never hurt MY future husband by taking the life of his unborn child."

"Oswald, c'mon, she isn't worth it," I was about to go into heavy detailing and reasoning with him, if I had to. 

"If I ever see you again, Cobblepot, I'll kill you, you won't even have a chance to think about!" 

"Why are you so fucking crazy!? What the hell do you even have to be so angry about!?" Oswald yelled back at her. 

"You! You stole my man!"

"I didn't steal anyone, you dumb bitch. You practically handed him over. It just so happens that I am the better lover." He said cool, calm, and collected, turning away from her to join me. 

I was torn. Barbara was crying. In a way, I would always have some loyalty to her. I would always have some residual feelings, more now because of the life that was growing inside of her. However, Oswald was my life now. He was everything to me. 

In reality, I made my choice months ago. 

I wrapped an arm around Oswald's waist, pulling him close. "You are a marvel of the strangest kind,"

"I know,"

***

When we arrived at Oswald's home, he slammed the door shut behind us, pressing me directly into it. He brutally kissed me, hands and body flush against me as our teeth and tongues and lips collided in fevered passion. I moaned into his mouth, feeling already noticeably hard when his hips began to grind against mine. 

"Oz..." I tried to say before he captured me again and swallowed my growl of pleasure.

His creative hands undid the belt I wore, slipping beneath the waistband as soon as he had found enough give. My breath hitched as his fingers wrapped tightly around my arousal, squeezing lightly. 

He continued to kiss me, deeply, deliciously. His lips traveled away from my mouth, across my jaw, down my neck, all the while still teasing my hard cock with his hands. 

"Oswald? Is that you? Are you home?" His mother came into the foyer, flicking on the main light. 

Oswald quickly removed his hand from my pants, spinning around to face his mother with an embarrassed look on his face. I felt a bit worse, because she couldn't see where his hands had been, but my pants being open in the front was going to give her a pretty good idea. 

"Oh! Am I interrupting something?" She asked, awkwardly big smile on her face.

"No!" Oswald and I said in unison, awkward reality sinking in. 

"It is fine. It is fine. You two are in love. You two are supposed to making lots of sex." Her words only made the situation worse. 

"Mother!" Oswald shouted.

This was my life now, this bizarre little thing.

 


	17. All The Desperation

Oswald and I sat side by side, questioning everything. Well, not quite everything, but enough to where we had been sitting in complete silence for at least fifteen minutes.

One thing was certain, we needed to find a place of our own. Couldn't be the clocktower. Couldn't be the bachelor pad that I used to default to when I was angry. At most of all, it could not be his mother's home. 

We both turned our heads towards each other at the same time. "We need to start looking for houses," The words came out of our mouth's in unison. 

Laughter ensued, as it should.

"I could use my connections, I am sure that there is a nice home somewhere in the city for the two of us, one with at least three bedrooms," Oswald began, now that we were finally not mirroring each other's actions.

"Three bedrooms?" I repeated back, slightly confused.

"Well, the master suite, of course, and then, one for your child with Barbara, and one for the possibility of expanding our family with a child that is ours," He explained.

"Where are we going to get one of those?"

"Connections, remember, I said I had those," He chuckled. "It would be a long while, I'd...I'd like to be married to you first,"

"At least we are on the same page there,"

He leaned his head against my shoulder. "Do you ever worry about your job impacting our relationship because of...my job?"

I nodded. "Unfortunately, I worry about it constantly,"

"Do you think there is any way around it?"

"Probably, just none that will make either of us happy at the moment,"

His big, adoring eyes looked up at me, met mine and threatened to take my breath away. He placed a hand on the side of my neck, pressing kisses in a line up to my mouth before catching me in a lip lock. I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him down onto the bed with me. 

I could not have found a better match. 

"Perhaps, after you are done trying to clean up Gotham, you will consider leaving it behind, we could both leave our pasts behind, somewhere far away from this place,"

I tilted my head up slightly to better look into his eyes, constantly wondering if he was playing some sort of angle. "But you love this city, that is why you came back,"

"It was not the only reason, you know that," Oswald whispered. "My main reason is so important to me that I would leave everything behind. I-I would forget every-thing, if it meant...I would always be by your side."

"I love you," I said, pulling him in close.

"I love you, too,"

"It's settled then, we have house hunting to do,"

***

Work had been a pure distraction for me at one point. It had also been something that helped clear my head, kept me on track. Plus, I loved what I did. I knew that there was no hope for Gotham if people like me didn't stand up for what we believed in. 

Now, things had felt a bit different. I was lost in the love that consumed me entirely. 

Work was now something that kept me apart from the one thing I felt I needed the most.

I couldn't remember when I turned into such a bubbling mess, a softy, but I didn't want to change. All I wanted was for him to be in my arms. Just because I wanted him in my arms at all times didn't make me that weird, opposites attracted all of the time, and we weren't even that different, to be completely honest.

We were just on two different sides of the law. 

I knew Harvey was watching me, he tended to do so whenever I seemed out of sorts. He had the decency to wait and see if I was going to say something first, which I usually did not, but his curiosity was always there. 

I glanced up from the non work related thing I was writing on a piece of paper. It was just above being gibberish, and just below being fully coherent. Apparently, I was never going to be able to write vows and therefore my marriage to Oswald was going to be rather basic. He was going to write something amazing, that made it worse.

"Just ask me whatever it is that you want to know and I will decide then if I actually want to answer it," I told Harvey.

He leaned forward. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

The corners of my mouth turned upwards. "I'm sorry, I am going to need you to be a little more specific,"

"So, I've been thinking about your arrangement with Penguin, there is a whole lot of illegal going on right there. You are a cop, he is garbage scum..."

I cut him off. No one was going to talk about my fiance that way. Even if that was the way that they actually felt. "Ba...no, he is not garbage scum. You will not talk about my fiance that way..." 

Of course, I never intended to tell Harvey that I was going to marry the man any time soon. 

"Fiance!? Fiance!?" He shouted in disbelief. 

I sank back into my chair. "Could you be any louder?"

"Probably! FIANCE!" 

"Yes, I proposed, he said yes, that is how that works, and just because I know it makes you uncomfortable, I love him and he will be mine, till death do us part."

"Um...there is still a whole lot of illegal going on right there,"

"Yeah, that is something I am willing to accept, can you accept that I am marrying him? It isn't as if you are one to follow rules all of the time, anyways."

"Only if I get to be your best man,"

I chuckled. "We have a deal,"

***

"Dress me in your finest armani!" Oswald shouted, sprawled out along the sofa, wearing absolutely nothing with only a small bit of a sheet he was wrapped in covering his manhood. The sight was enticing. 

I shook my head and walked over to him, caressing his cheek. "I prefer you undressed,"

"I cannot be...naked for the wedding, Jim,"

"Sure you can, and everyone in attendance would be jealous of me afterward," I said, sealing it with a kiss. 

"Mmm..." He purred. "Perhaps, we could discuss this upstairs?"

I scooped him up bridal style, for practice. "Couldn't think of a better place to do that,"


	18. What A Perfectly, Wonderful Way To Destroy Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time jumps and things to support the extremely long absence of me updating this fic. :)

Time was an incredible concept. I thought this to be even more true after the realization that I had spent so much of the last week and a half going to showings of random houses in and out of Gotham. The better ones obviously being out of Gotham. I had decided that I was willing to make the drive into the city for work from a suburb simply because I wanted a better life for my family. 

A family that was going getting bigger by the minute. 

My DAUGHTER was going to enter the world in three short months. 

I would have a husband in only one. 

AND, that future husband of mine had decided to pick up a stray puppy on his way home one day. Despite all attempts to convince him that it was a bad idea, and all other attempts to find it a different home, I had a six month old dalmatian black lab mix named Penny. 

Oh, what a life. 

What was worse was that I still had not managed to write vows. I knew for a fact that Oswald had finished his weeks ago. It made me jealous. I wasn't sure when I began to lack all of the creativity, but my brain was making sure that it was the case. I hated it. Generic and traditional was exactly where I was going to wind up. 

Time was such an incredible concept.

***

"Harvey," I half mumbled, hoping he was paying enough attention to realize that I was indeed speaking his name.

He looked over at me, blinking wildly as if he had just woken up from a nap with his vision blurry. "Yeah, Jim? What do you want?"

"You still haven't told me if you are going to be my best man or not, there is literally only a month until my wedding...I will ask Nygma,"

Harvey scoffed. "No, you won't,"

"Try me,"

"C'mon, Jim, seriously, you already know that I am going to be your best man. Do I really have to tell you that I am? I'm your friend and your partner. And, even though I find your union with the Penguin creepy, weird, and unnatural, I will support you to the best of my abilities." 

I broke into a smile. The most moronic smile that one could possibly imagine. I had been asking him every single day, getting no response that was valid. 

This, this was progress.

Progress was great.

"THANK YOU! THANK YOU!" I chuckled. "Now, help me write my vows,"

His eyes grew large. "You still haven't finished them?! Are you kidding?!"

I shoved my notebook across the table towards him. "Do I look like I would kid about something like this? It has been driving me insane since I proposed to the man!"

"Why don't you start with a quote or something? Penguin has got to have a favorite author or something, little goth probably is into Poe."

Without warning my forehead made contact with the table, tapping the palm of my hand against the surface. I was done. There was no hope for me anymore.

"Get it together, Jim," Harvey said, grabbing me by the hair.

"I am not sure what that means, it isn't possible for me,"

"Then I am not helping,"

I rolled my eyes. It was just a curse and a miracle that my phone started ringing at that very moment. I quickly pulled it out of my pocket with hopes that it was my beloved, but it wasn't. It was Barbara. Considering how infrequently she called me I was worried. We did have a baby on the way. All or at least some of the deities knew that I didn't want anything bad to happen to my child.

"Hello, Barbara?"

_" **Jim! Jim! I need you to meet me at Gotham General! Now! Please!"**_

"Why? What's wrong?!"

_**"The baby is coming! I'm scared and I need you here!"** _

"I'll be there as soon as I can!" I shouted before hanging up. I could hear the fear rocking the tone of my voice. 

"What is going on? You look like someone just kicked your puppy." Harvey asked.

"Barbara is in labor. I have to get a hold of Oswald. She still has two months to go. What if something bad happens? I don't know what to do."

"Are you going to be okay to drive? You don't look like it."

"Probably not. I need Oswald."

"No, no, I will drive you and you can dedicate your focus to calling your fiance and directing him where to go. Okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, let's go,"

***

Oswald met up with Harvey and I at the hospital. Barbara was already admitted to a room. I was still freaking out, shaking, desperately wondering what might have caused something like this to happen. She had taken such good care of herself throughout the entire pregnancy. She wanted this baby just as much as I did. Of course, she wanted the baby healthy and happy. 

I rushed up to the nearest nurse, using as much restraint as possible. "Is there any way that I can get the room number for Barbara Kean?"

"Why do you need that?"

"Because I am her baby's father, that is why," I told the woman. "And, my fiance and I would like to be there when the baby is born, no matter what the endgame is."

The nurse raised an eyebrow at me, then she glanced over at Harvey and Oswald. Those two looked so strange standing next to each other. "Which one is your fiance?"

"The one with the black hair and the limp, now can we see her or not?" 

"Is she your surrogate?"

"It is complicated, so can we or can't we?"

"You need to answer the question, sir,"

I sighed, becoming increasingly impatient. Usually I liked medical staff. Where was Dr. Thompkins when I needed her? "I am her ex-fiance, but then things happened and now the black haired man is my fiance."

"You will be able to enter the room, but your fiance does not have any relation to the child or the mother, therefore he will need to wait in the lobby." 

"Okay, alright, take me to Miss Kean, please,"

The nurse that was beginning to seem more and more bitchy as she lead me away. I was only managing to become more and more nervous. I was anxious about what I was going to walk into. 

 


End file.
